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understanding humans

Posted Dec 01 2009 1:47pm
Hi humans and woof doggies!

Jen can't think of anything to write about so she allowed me to steel the computer. She said I can talk about whatever I want, as long as I mention two things first
Today is the start of Brucember. That means that
Alison Curtis
is playing a song by the boss every night on her show (monday to thursday, 10-midnight) on today fm. I think I know her. She's got a funny accent (Jen says she's Canadian whatever that means!) and I get to hear her on the radio in the kitchen when I'm lying beside the cooker keeping warm, and relaxing after a hard days work. I recognise a lot of the music because Jen plays it on her own music show when we go to the radio station.

I also have to tell you that the people at Irish guide dogs where I went to school are looking for people to sign up for the
Mizen to Malin cycle
in May 2010. Thank God us dogs don't have to do it. If Jen did it i'd get a whole week off work. That would be heaven! I would miss her a lot though.

Everybody keeps talking about a few things that make me really confused. First of all, the recession. What the hell does recession mean? Everyone seems angry and worried. Why? I have food and toys and people to pet me. I don't worry about anything.
Who or what is Jedward? Jen gets really angry when people mention it. Sometimes she uses naughty words. What did they do to her? Should I attack them if I ever see them?
Floods. What are floods? I think they are to do with the weather, but the weather here in Donegal is cold like last year and no different. Floods are really bad whatever they are.
Christmas. I remember this from last year and the years before that, but why do humans have so much to do? Shopping, buying presents, going for dinner and more dinner and parties and just so much stuff.

Jen spends a lot of time touching things, but sometimes touching things that aren't me. Things with buttons. Things with keys. Things that talk very very fast and are impossible for my ears to understand. Most of these things make noise. If I bark and make a lot of noise she tells me to stop. This doesn't make sense. Sometimes I can't hear the noise because she puts these things in her ears and wires come out of her ears then. It looks funny. She does this on the bus or when we're in work.
Sometimes she sits at the kitchen table with tea or coffee or whatever they put in those cup things that people always seem to have, and touches paper. The paper has dots or bumps on it. They all look the same to me, but Jen says she is reading. How can this be reading? How can it make any sense.

If Clive, Pearce, Toby, Freddie, Ralph or any other dog that might read this can make sense of the world of these crazy humans, please help me!

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