Quickie Update: Jeans, Lactose Intolerance, Cheerleaders (Plus: Your most embarrassing moments)
Posted Sep 09 2012 1:38am
One last summer evening at the beach…
I don’t normally post on Saturdays but I’ve had such an eventful weekend (more on that Monday)! I wanted to give you a quick update on some of the things we’ve been talking about on here that I didn’t think warranted their own post. Read if you’re interested, otherwise carry on Happy Weekending!
After literally ripping the butt out of my own jeans last week, I realized that the time had come to finally be a grown-up and buy myself a real pair of pants that didn’t come from a thrift store or a hand-me-down from a friend. Even though I’d rather shop for swimsuits than denim, I marched myself into the nearest mall and handed my “athletic” thighs off to a girl who not only was half my age but whose thighs were half my size. Oy. But she’d come highly recommended by several friends so I sucked it up. After assessing my body type (which was awkward considering I am awesome and wore a maxi dress to the fitting thereby necessitating that her and I cram into a dressing room together so I could flash her), she picked three brands that would flatter me and brought me like 50 different pairs of jeans to try on. After an hour of wiggling in and out of dark wash denim, I finally settled on a pair that made my butt look fab, made my thighs look decent and overall looked adorable. I’ve been wearing them all week and I gotta say they feel amazing. (Which they better be considering how much they cost – eek.) They’re stretchy but they hold their shape. There’s still a little gap at my waist but it’s livable. And best of all my strong legs have plenty of breathing room! TA-DA!
Not because I’m advertising for them (believe me when I say I did not get these for free!) but because I know someone will ask: They’re Silver brand “Suki Surplus Curvy Fit” style with a mid rise, relaxed hip & thigh, bootcut leg.
I do believe my thighs are relaxed! The world is safe for squatting again.
Why yes I AM taking a picture of my butt in the mirror with my cell phone to post on the Internet. Stay classy, Charlotte.
Milk is not my friend. It’s official. I’ve been off of dairy entirely for about three weeks now and not only have I not had any panic attacks but I’ve not even had a flutter of anxiety. Which is nothing short of a miracle for this girl. I haven’t felt this even in years. I know how kooky this sounds. (When I told my sister she said “Wow, you’ve officially become that girl. Next thing you know you’ll be pounding wheat grass shots and braiding hemp into your hair.”) But I’ve done a lot of research on lactose intolerance and dairy intolerances – a condition which over half the population has (90% if you’re black, 100% if you’re native American) – and I think what I’ve been calling panic attacks are really just a bad reaction to milk products. Most people think of lactose intolerance as bloating and gassiness but vomiting, diarrhea and severe pain are not unheard of. And I think that I would then panic because I was afraid of the pain and also because it was really painful. But placebo effect or read deal, it’s working and I’m sticking with it.
There was a lot of discussion in the comments of my post on this about whether this is just my same eating disorder, different day. And I really appreciate everyone who brought that up – it makes me feel really grateful that I have so many people in my life who care about me and want me to be healthy. So here’s the difference in my mind between my taking dairy out of my diet and my previous restrictions related to my EDs: 1) I am 100% open about this. I’m not hiding anything. I have discussed this in depth with my therapist, my MD, and my nutritionist. All of them are on board. 2) I’m not doing this to try and lose weight. I’m not actively trying to lose weight at all. And I’m not losing any weight (so far as I can tell from my clothes since I haven’t weighed myself at all since the debacle a couple of months ago). So please do stay on top of me in regards to the eating disorder stuff. It’s something I need to stay constantly vigilant about to avoid a relapse. But at this point in time it feels like nothing but utter relief to me. Losing ice cream is nothing compared to how calm and even I’ve felt the past few weeks.
Remember when I got to workout with the Minnesota Vikings cheerleaders ? It was super fun and I wrote it up and did a slideshow for Shape.com. It went so well that I also wrote it up for the Minneapolis Star Tribune and they made it their front page feature of the variety section! Unfortunately there’s been a lot of controversy about the headline of the piece: “ Vikings Cheerleaders: ‘Tougher Workouts Than Marines’ ” I did not write that headline. (Little known fact: most writers do not write their own headlines. Editors do. And the #1 criteria for a good headline is how many eyeballs it can catch. Winner, winner, chicken dinner!) The ensuing discussion has been interesting, entertaining and slightly insane. But if you read the whole article I think you’ll get a better sense of what the cheerleader meant when she said that.
Why It’s Great to be a Sports Fan: I’m really not much of a sports fan so when I posed this question on Facebook I was utterly amazed at how much meaning, joy, education and entertainment so many of you get from being a sports fan. I laughed, I cried, and I might have even changed my mind about watching a football game…
What Every Woman Needs to Know About Self Defense : Sensei Don made a comeback to give Gym Buddy Megan, Intern Brittney and I a primer on self defense. While you can’t learn everything you need to help protect yourself in 8 slides, he gives you some great places to start and skills to practice. (Plus this was one of the most hilarious photoshoots I’ve ever done. “Okay, now pin Megan down by her arms. Yeah, now straddle her. Can you stop looking so happy Megan? It’s not THAT kind of picture.” Good times.)