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You have permission to be in close relationship with yourself and others.

Posted Dec 25 2012 8:31am

As you give yourself permission to be in close relationships with people you care about in whatever way that works for each of you, you enable yourself to move closer to your ultimate goal of replacing your dependence on the eating disorder with the interdependence of real human relationships! -Quote from Beating Ana

Whether you believe it or not at the moment, you already have permission to say “Adios, Ed” and choose new friends.

You also have permission to befriend yourself if you want to do so.

You don’t need Ed’s permission to do these things. Unless you think you do – and then you do.

One of the most difficult steps to take in recovery is to admit to yourself that you have been following the guidance and advice of a total loser – which is what Ed is. It may sting a little or hurt a lot to admit this. You may get hung up for awhile on the mistakes you have made or the time you have wasted.

Just don’t let yourself get hung up for too long on these things.

Feel them, deal with them, grieve the losses you may have incurred because at that time you didn’t know any better, and then MOVE ON.

Move on so that Ed cannot harm you or hurt you anymore. Move on so that others will know that if you can do it they can too. Move on so Ed feels the sting – the ache – of relationships lost. Move on because if you don’t, you won’t survive Ed’s “help” forever.

What do you need to do to start moving on? Do you need to rage? Do you need to cry? Do you need to whine or quake or hide under the bed?

Whatever you need to do, DO IT, and then affirm yourself for doing this difficult work and taking the first step towards a supportive relationship with yourself and others that leaves no room for Ed AT ALL.

xo

Shannon

 

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