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Whoever said money can't buy happiness never went on a yarn crawl

Posted Nov 02 2011 12:27am
This past Saturday, I went with my knitting and crochet group on a yarn crawl to a nearby city. What's a yarn crawl, you ask? Well, it's like a pub crawl, where you visit a series of pubs (or yarn shops), one right after the other, sampling the wares (and fondling merino superwash at $35/hank) along the way. We had been looking forward to this for weeks, and the day did not disappoint.

I am not looking forward to getting the bills. But I did pick up some beautiful swag.

We hit three shops and lunch during the day, and made brief detours to two different cupcake places. Having to specify which cupcakes you're eating means it had to have been a good day.

The nice thing was that it made me feel so normal. I wasn't "Carrie the Girl with the ED." I was "Carrie the Crocheter" or "Carrie who has to fondle all the yarn." Or even just "Carrie." It was a nice change from my day to day life where the ED stuff is front and center. Yes, I have a fulfilling career and good hobbies and friends and family, but the ED, food, and recovery occupy a lot of my thoughts. Just for a few hours, I got to pretend I was normal like everyone else.

That was nice.

The irony is that I had to put so much work into recovery until I could actually get to this point. Not all that long ago, I wouldn't have gone because I would have had to navigate lunch and it would have interrupted my exercise routine. Then add the whole "spending money on myself" thing, and it would have been a disaster. So after placing all of my other obligations to the side (or at least demoting them on my to do list) and really doing all of the hard, seemingly unrewarding recovery work, I finally got to experience normalcy. Or the closest thing to it when your yarn bill for one day may very well have hit the triple digits.

I have to remind myself: I'm not destitute. I deserve good things. I can handle stressful situations. I will be okay.

It was a lovely day, and I know that all of the bills will have been worth it to feel like I'm part of the world again.
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