Gotta love those (not) exciting Friday nights as a single. I ate leftovers for dinner. I looked for recipes to make something for a dessert. I studied immunology for my first exam on Tuesday. I picked up a few random things around my apartment. I did a quick workout. I paid my bills.
Now I'm here, blogging.
Damn I live an exciting life.
I have so much stuff to do, and I sit down to do it, and I can't stay focused. I feel so lazy because of how long it's taking me to do basically anything. I feel my years "off" from school/work have made me lazy. I remember working for 9 hours straight at my computer. Okay, it was when I had broken my ankle and was on crutches and probably was the past of least resistance.
It's such a different story today.
Part of me is flat-out tired and hormonal. I'm also frustrated because all of this stuff keeps flying at me. Turn in one story, start another. The grading for my class. Cooking. Cleaning. I think if I had the same amount of stuff to be done, but it was condensed into two or three big tasks, I would feel better. Because then I would actually feel like I had gotten something done. Somehow, putting the dinner dishes away just doesn't give the same feeling of satisfaction.
Tomorrow is- you guessed it- more of the same.
I'm trying to think of something to look forward to that might keep me going better. Something fun. And cheap, because I'm blowing through money at a hideous rate. Nothing that is particularly outlandish and unnecessary, just that the expenses this past week have really been totalling up. That frustrates me, too. I'm hoping that this spending phase is over with. Soon.
I don't know what I'm feeling. Exhaustion. Frustration. Discouragement. Those kinds of things. I don't think I'm particularly depressed, just that all of this little stupid stuff is wearing me out to the point that I don't have the same enthusiasm for the things I really want to do.