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Freaking shoes.

Posted Jan 31 2012 7:50am
Every night I lay my workout clothes out at the foot of my bed in preparation for the next day. 

I do this because if my workout clothes are readily accessible I will be less noisy when I get up to exercise and will be generally more apt to get out of my warm bed if my clothes are within reach and not scattered across various bedroom drawers.

Every night I set my alarm for 6am, confirm that my iPod is charged, headphones at the ready, and hair ties handy.

I fall asleep thinking of how great it will be when I get up, feeling rested, and hit the treadmill for 30 minutes to an hour.  I'll feel amazing all day!  I'll look down at others around me, smugly thinking "I bet they weren't working out at the crack of dawn" and pat myself on the back.  I'll have earned my meals for the day, yes siree, and will make excellent food choices to ensure that I receive the full benefit of my grueling pre-dawn workout.

It will be awesome.

But when 6am inevitably chimes on my alarm clock my internal dialogue goes like this
[turns body over and turns alarm off]
"It can't possibly be 6am.  I'll just lie here until 6:05."
"I have a hard day ahead of me, I need my sleep, working out will only make my day more stressful.  But that means I have to work out at night, and I really hate working out at night.  Okay, just get up now. Right now.  Now."
[body unable to move]
"Oh F-ck it"
[Falls back asleep until 7:30am]

So my workout clothes don't typically get used.  Instead they sit at the foot of my bed mocking me.  How can I be expected to lose weight when my gym clothes make me feel bad about myself? 

Shut up, shoes.
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