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Dancing In The Rain

Posted Sep 18 2012 4:44am

“Life is not about waiting for the storm to pass. It is about learning to dance in the rain.”

I have no idea who originally said this. I just know I follow “Motivational Quotes” on twitter, saw their tweet with this statement at 4:30 yesterday morning and felt like it was exactly what I needed to start my day.

Who doesn’t need a little positivity to begin their work week?! But I felt like this was especially applicable after the Saturday and Sunday Ryan and I had.

Backtrack to FRIDAY.

Ryan, myself and two of our very good friends from high school went to see Trent Cantrelle at Rumor, in Philadelphia.

We were celebrating a birthday and Trent Cantrelle is amazing so really there was no better place to be than at my favorite club.

We had a blast! Not only because of the great music and dancing, but because Ry and I were with two guys that we both love and miss terribly now that they no longer live in our hometown.

Unfortunately, because we have known them forever, they are not uncomfortable being honest and I suppose had a little chat with my other half about my lack of physical progress.

All three very important males in my life agreed there are moments where I am absolutely back to my old fun-loving self; who was happy, full of life and always ready to dance…but despite these fantastic strides, it is seriously hard to ignore the exterior facts.

This led to a Saturday afternoon of in-depth discussions, from my angle, Ryan’s and a very close friend of mine, who felt a more vigorous plan of attack was needed; especially if I wanted to continue going to shows, clubs, persue certain life changes, and enjoy activities that I maybe shouldn’t be doing just yet. Neither Brielle or Ryan were being angry or cruel, just expressing their concern and insight on my capabilities of conquering such a demon by myself.

I am going to skip over the details and get back to my original quote because as I told you last week, I am kind of sick of the same old song, but I promise there is a correlation between the weekend recap and the person I follow via social-media…

So dancing in the rain…

If you have read any of my blog in the past few months it is pretty obvious dance is an immense passion of mine. It gives me the freedom to express myself in a manner I have not totally felt comfortable with my whole life because it involves me feeling my body and actually acknowledging its presence, when typically I opt for the route of disassociation.

And although the quote is not directly talking about the act of dancing in the rain, it is referring to EXPERIENCING life even if the situation isn’t perfect, or the way we necessarily think is fair.

In other words, no one should just sit around waiting for the tough stuff to pass because that only leads to missing out on awesome opportunities, memories with friends, etc.

In the past two weeks there have been two people I know who passed away. One was only twenty years old…

Does that prove that life is short? That it can be taken in an instant?

It certainly made me reflect on the things I have deprived myself of, my family of, and how wonderful LIVING can truly be if I just let go.

It definitely made me think of how unfair I have been to Ryan.

In our discussion Saturday he told me how much happier he has been lately since I am finally becoming more social and we are participating in events that we did in our dating or early marriage years, but that he sometimes gets sad because he knows our lives could and WILL be so much more.

Well, tomorrow is a milestone for us.

Tomorrow is our 3 year wedding anniversary and going back to the original quote, we have endured a lot of crappy weather.

Not to sound unappreciative or completely negative, because we have had many days of sun, but truthfully there have been more clouds than I would like to admit and I know he, especially, deserves a vacation.

Like I said, we are very very lucky in so many respects; to have each other, both have jobs, a home, families, and loving friends that absolutely make life worth living, but I know I can give him more.

Our weekend trips to hear music and dance around are wonderful, but I need to start shifting my moves from the floor to the street…embracing and enduring all types of weather.

Maybe that is enough with the symbolism for today, but seriously, life is not going to be rainbows and blue sky at all times, but, I KNOW am a strong enough woman, and a smart enough woman, to stop letting the discomfort I feel doing the right things in recovery, and the aspects of my life I complain about way too often, to effect the entire forecast.

(I did say I was done with the symbolism, didn’t I?)

I fully intend on having FOREVER amount of anniversaries with this man, and because I want them to be as fabulous as we both deserve, I really need to throw on my dancing shoes.

Isn’t it ironic that it’s raining here in central PA today?!!


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