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But you see, Courtney, that's ex...

Posted Sep 22 2008 10:59am

But you see, Courtney, that's exactly the point:

By western society's standards (wacky as they are), this client would be considered chubby.

That's why this is such a great recovery story. She didn't end up with the "perfect" (emaciated) body that our society dictates we should all either have, or kill ourselves trying to get.

So, she's not built to naturally be very, very tiny (some people are naturally built to be very, very tiny- I once, about 15 years ago, heard a statistic that the number of people who are naturally born with a body like we see in fashion magazines is about 1 in 26,000... the rest of the people we see that look like that starve themselves to get that body... pretty staggering, right!?).

Does that mean she shouldn't get to keep her power? Absolutely not!!!! Getting to own our power (and our bodies and our minds and our beliefs.... you get the point) is entirely unrelated to our body size and/or shape. Wholly unrelated.

It's a huge myth we all think we need to buy into. In fact, from very early on in our lives we are kind of "trained" (through the images we see, though the messages we get from our culture and sometimes from family and/or other relatives or friends) to believe that we don't deserve to have power or to have healthy self-esteem or be happy with ourselves unless we are "thin enough" or have a "perfect body" (whatever that is- I'm still not sure, even after being on the earth for more than 40 years!).

This client, after much soul searching and experimentation, came to the very accurate conclusion that she could feel as good as she wanted about herself, that she could be as powerful as she wanted, whatever her weight was, is, or may ever be.

What makes this such a great recovery story is that her friend's comment, while annoying and momentarily jarring, did nothing to damage or change how she felt about herself. Her friend didn't get to have power over her; she got to have power for herself.

And, yes, Courtney, you are also correct that people can be mean. That is unfortunately true- and all the more reason we need to work diligently to claim and maintain our power- so they can't have it.

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