Today is a day that we remember our loved ones who have passed on before us, as well as those that give their lives for our freedom.
This last week I have been given a few reality checks.
The first one came in the form of a close family friend who was killed by a roadside bomb while serving in Afghanistan. He wasn't supposed to be there, he had signed up for a second 6 months there. Then he wasn't supposed to be in the Humvee that day either, he went for another person. He left behind his beautiful wife and his beautiful sons. He was only a year older than I am. He was based out of Washington, and while his Mother and Father in law will be there for his memorial service next week, I will be taking care of his 9 year old step sister for the week that they are gone.
They were so worried to " burden " me, with another child, yet I am so honored that I can help ease their minds knowing that she will be taken care of. This is an amazing family, and I am sure my kids are going to be just ecstatic to have a playmate for a week.
The next reality check came in the form of a family who lives not far from us who just lost their 5 year old little girl who has Down syndrome, to Pulmonary Hypertension . Of course this hits home because of Rhett's diagnosis of PH . It's an ugly disease that takes away so many young lives. I know that Rhett has an incredible doctor for his cardiologist, but it also hits home when you learn that this little girl had the same cardiologist.
Then I was just at another friends blog, and saw a chest xray of her little girl. Rhett's heart is huge on his chest xray's in comparison to hers, and they are nearly the same age. I know that he has always had an enlarged heart, but seeing it in comparison to a " normal " heart is again another reality check.
I have been trying really hard not to be in a funk, I really have. I have tried to be positive, but I am scared. I am again getting the pre-surgery jitters. I know it's still three weeks away, but it's coming so fast, and I hate the anxiety of it all, especially given the bad news that we have seen the last week.
I know I need to be focusing on the positive, and I am trying to. I am loving Rhett, and the rest of my kids with all of my might. Every day . If it's one thing you learn when having a child who is medically fragile, or with special needs, its that you never take any breath, smile, tear, or giggle for granted.