Addressing self-care

Getting through puberty seemed like a marathon, and just like a marathon, there was, finally , an end. The hardest part when we were in the thick of it was not knowing when it would end. Would it be six months or six years?



Along with the changes we made to support Kellen, we also made some changes for self-preservation. Kellen's dad and I started to share equally not only Kellen's care, but also the advocacy that we did for Kellen. It was exhausting for me to always be the one talking to or emailing his school team. During some of Kellen's worst weeks we had a designated "parent on call". We looked at our work day and decided who could afford to be called away in case the school called or who could afford to take the day off altogether. We let his teacher know who was the "parent on call" and the other parent was free to actually concentrate at work.



We have a tiny house in our backyard with electricity and heat, but no bathroom. We let our daughter move out there so that she could have a quiet retreat and get an undisturbed night's sleep.



We tried to do nice things for ourselves and take turns getting out with friends on Friday nights. It was good to take an occasional break and remember that there was still a life outside of the tornado of puberty.