Well, given my status as a male, I’m not really qualified to answer this question, but I’ll give it a shot.
How long after surgery should you wait to have sex (as a women)? I have read 6 weeks on the mayo clinic website, but the surgeon didn’t even mention anything to me.
The “six week rule” is a good one for many activities. As we’ve said before on this site, six weeks is the time after which your tissue (muscle, etc.), when examined under a microscope, is back to its pre-surgery state. About.com’s article on sex after surgery has a number of questions for you to answer to determine if you are ready (physically and mentally) and that might be a good place to start:
Do I feel like having sex? Do I have the energy at this time?
Are there certain positions that may be more comfortable than others?
Do I need to avoid putting pressure on a certain areas, such as an incision line?
Will we need to take any special measures? Some surgeries, such as vaginal surgeries, may cause dryness and make a lubricant necessary. Other surgeries, such as prostate surgery, may make an erection difficult to obtain and/or maintain, and may require medication or an additional procedure in order to maintain an erection.
Is there any reason to avoid pregnancy? Does my surgery, medications I am currently taking or my condition make contraception important?
Keep in mind that with the Jpouch surgeries, especially if they are “open” surgeries, your entire core of muscles has been cut through. If it hurts to cough, sneeze, laugh, cry, etc., you might need to wait a while. Also, most surgeons won’t mention sex directly, but when they say to wait however long “before returning to normal activity,” remember that sex is part of that normal routine. Read the about.com article here.