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Time is my enemy

Posted Jan 13 2014 10:15am
I'm drowning. Life is getting to be much too overwhelming, and my constant companion - mixed episode - just won't leave me alone. One minute I'm feeling horribly depressed, the next my agitated mania is ramping up. It just seems like I don't have enough time, no matter how early I wake up in the morning.

  • I put my jewelry shop on hiatus, which was quite depressing. I just don't have the time right now required to keep my passion going.
  • My other passion, bread baking has also gone by the wayside.
  • I joined Weight Watchers again, which makes me disappointed in myself. In four months, my emotional eating put back on 30 lbs of the 50 lbs I worked so hard to lose. All the meal planning, grocery shopping, tracking, etc. takes up quite a bit of time.
  • The Piriformis Syndrome is back, I haven't made the time to do my exercises. Nor have I made the time to do any kind of exercise. There's a challenge on WW to walk 5 minutes every hour. I set my alarm, then when it goes off I think "I don't have time to do that right now."
  • My mother-in-law's cat is dying, and she won't accept it, so I drive 20 minutes to her home and 20 minutes back to the vet here, then spend more time waiting for the vet to tell her the same thing over and over.
  • Meditation and mindfulness would help my mental health, but it seems I just can't make the time to do anything.
  • My computer's on the fritz, so it takes too much time to type. I need to stop, turn off the computer, turn it back on, repeat ad nauseum. Perhaps it's just the cold weather messing with the internet connection.
  • There were a few days when I was home bound because of the snow (I know, I'm not the only one). And the flu kicked my butt for almost two weeks.
  • Weekends are usually spent doing what other people want/need to do.

Never have I been so disorganized, I just can't seem to find the time to get organized so I have enough time to accomplish everything that needs to be done.

Did you notice how annoying it probably was for you to see the word "time" repeated eleven times? As annoying as it is for you to read it, that's how frustrating it is for me to deal with it.

I probably shouldn't have taken the time to write this.



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