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WhO i Am

Posted May 28 2010 12:00am
My name is Emalee, I am almost 32 years old. I am the 2ND Child, 2ND girl of my parents. I have what I call middle child syndrome. I  have felt that I have always had to fight for attention from my parents. My sister the first born, the first girl the perfect child. My brother, the first born boy, the baby, the one everyone loved to love. And then there is me The second Child, the first of nothing. The one who just blended into the background, the one who caused no problem for my parents growing up the forgotten child. I been thinking lately about who I AM and really I am a lot.  I am a peacemaker, I hate fighting and contention. The listener, I listen a lot. I might even give some good advice, i might not, but I listen. I am a jealous person. If someone is getting more attention then me, I get jealous. part of my MCS (Middle Child Syndrome) I have always felt this way, I still feel this way. I like to be the center of attention, I do things to get reactions from people. I hate feeling jealous, its not fun, it makes me kind of angry.( I hate this one)  I judge people, I talk behind peoples backs. I am nice to your face and as soon as you walk away and I don't like you I say something mean or roll my eyes. I hate people who judge, but yet I am very quick to make a judgement on people. I am not perfect, but then really who is. I am sarcastic, most people when they first met me think I am rude because of it. I might say something mean when I am sarcastic, it probably hurts peoples feelings. I don't like anyone to hate me, if you don't like me I am going to try to get you to like me. You will like me in the end because I want you too. I hate not feeling liked, it hurts. If I am your friend I am your friend no matter what. I don't stop dis-liking someone for any reason. Because, people say things, do things that might hurt you. in the end its probably something that can be fixed. I might be hurt for a while about it, but i am still your friend. I think I am funny, I KNOW I am funny. Sometimes I am funny at your expense and it might hurt you. I don't like to hurt people feelings. I was just trying to be what I think is funny. I am a hypochondriac, I always think I have something. Most of the time I really do. Growing up most of the time I didn't. Probably trying to get attention from my parents, I blame that on my MCS.  In more ways then one, I am like my mother. Some good, some bad. I feel left out of my family, like I said before, the forgotten child. I feel like somehow I don't fit in with them, that I am different from them. I get my feelings hurt easily, I stay hurt for a while too. I am someone who LOVES to take naps, always have and always will! I am a bit dramatic, if something has happened to me, I make a big deal out of it. I love giving, I love to buy gifts to see you open them, your reactions. It makes me happy. All these things am make me who I am.
Like my blog title says
 I AM ME
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