JENNY: I love your moment when you decide you will no longer live with autism. You question whether you dare be that powerful and responsible to heal your mind, body and spirit? I came to that point with my diseases where this KNOWINGNESS overcame me and I knew it was up to ME to make myself better… I did not know if it would be 100% better but I knew I could sure do a lot better than I was doing. This resonated so deeply with me Robin and it is has been a difficult thing to explain to people that knowingness yet question of our own power. What was it that made you get to this point? Can you give any advice to people that might want to heal, and know on some level life can be better but cannot yet stand in their belief of their own power?
ROBIN: This question ties in perfectly with what I just said about being merged with all life. When we can feel this merged state of being, we experience a deep unwavering sense of safety. It is a body knowing, not something in our “heads” or thoughts. When we KNOW that we are part of everything that exists, and ever will exist, when we know that we are LIFE itself, we realize that we can do anything. Being regularly close to nature even in small ways helps us feel this vastness of life that we ARE. From this place we know we are powerful and we suddenly feel a great freedom to push back any limiting boundaries or social conditioning. We WANT to take full responsibility for our own lives. Life WANTS to LIVE.
I shed a lot of social conditioning, let go of addictive behaviors, old thinking (pretty much everything from my culture). I started questioning all I’d been taught. I allowed ALL emotions and thoughts to rise up unbridled, and even let them overwhelm me, while I observed them without judgment. In doing this I not only came to understand human nature, but I set myself free. I became emotionally stronger, less fearful, and I KNEW that I was life itself exploring the unknown. I felt adventurous, brave and excited. I was pioneering life. That’s awesome freedom!
I realized in the rainforest how easily we give up our power. We turn it over to doctors, lawyers, dentists, counselors, spiritual healers, gurus, teachers, friends, and so on, with the attitude that we couldn’t possibly know what’s best for us, or that THEY must know more than we do. Sometimes if we haven’t taken time to get to know ourselves and life/nature, then our chosen “learned figureheads” may know more than we do. HOWEVER, what they know may not be right for us. Not all truths serve us. We are each unique. Besides that, there is great power in coming to our own truth in our own way, in a holistic and intrinsic way. It then is no longer just a truth of the mind. It becomes truth imprinted in every cell of our body, in our very DNA, and on our soul. Our soul then experiences EVOLUTION right now.
I am not saying that we should never let others help or guide us, but not to the exclusion of discovering our own truth, our own path, and our own unique life experience, which may also involve soul growth (or evolution), as well as physical healing. Healing can happen on many levels. Sometimes part of our healing is tied up with letting go of fear and doubt, and learning to trust ourselves and life.
When I developed my intimate relationship with nature, I saw its “intact-ness” or holistic-ness. Each part was a part of every other part. When I saw this, I realized that no one I’d known had ever approached healing with the point of view that life is ALREADY intact and intelligent. It already knows what to do given the opportunity. I also realized that no one had ever seen me as intelligent, not just because I got poor grades in school, but because they did not see themselves as intelligent. The definition of intelligence in my culture was limited to book learning, school, college, Ph.D., M.D., etc. This was not a definition that understood LIFE as intelligence itself.
Often the best way we can help another person heal, is to SEE their “born with” intelligence. It is to experience them as ALREADY intelligent, already whole, and to respond to and speak directly to this intelligent life force, which we all ARE. To see this in another person can often spark their own healing.
In the presence of such wholeness in the rainforest, I started to become disgusted with the way I’d given up my power. It felt horrible in my body. In fact, I wanted to push back all I’d known and start fresh. I hungered to take back my own power and healing, even if I died. I had nothing to lose because I was already suffering and dying. In essence, in giving up my power, I lost myself, and that kept me ill, no matter how many healers I saw.
Part of my healing was to claim my own power, my own right to life, my own place in the Universe with all the rest of brilliant intelligent life. I was ill because I was NOT claiming my place. That may not be what initially made me ill. BUT WAIT, it was what made me ill because those who came before me also had not claimed their place, or their connection to the Great Universe. So they too we’re lost and powerless. At some point they had given up their power. They had forgotten their connection to all that exists.
One day, in the forest, I realized that I had been ill because I’d grown up out of connection with that which I needed most, that which I AM…all the rest of Existence, from the gentle dolphins, to the millions of grains of sand, to the powerful seas, infinite stars, and all the Great Universe I am part of. I only had to look around me and see the miraculous existence of red flowers and blue butterflies, sliver stars and golden moon, to know that anything is possible. Life is creating colors, for god’s sake! I certainly can heal myself. I can be with these great creations and draw sustenance and healing from the miracle of their existence. We all can.
JENNY: You are SO right Robin! We CAN all heal ourselves. We are all healers . We can all create miracles. We are so often not standing in our power. I love Marianne Wiliamson’s quote on us not being afraid of our darkness but our light. It is SO important we connect with ourselves, our souls to truly understand “we are unlimited and all knowing”. You are SUCH an inspiration – thank you for sharing your experience with healing – it mirrors mine in many ways. Some people get stuck at the “being disgusted with themselves” when they realize that they have been acting not even in a way they truly believe to be them. But I think it should be the opposite EMPOWERING.. forgive yourself for what you did not know until now and life BEGINS NOW.
Another passage that struck me to my core was the following;
“A true artist, musician, genius, writer, healer doesn’t create something new out of thin air, although it may appear that way. They tap into the creativity of the universe, an intelligence that’s part of us all. It’s just a matter of seeing what already exists and remembering who we are.”
This rings so true to me Robin. If I try and create with my mind it can takes hours of “work” when I tap into my Higher self – and the Universe as a whole… the words flow and creating IS a remembering of things I have always known. I am a believer in that when we do know who we truly are – our soul and our connection to everyone and everything else we KNOW no limits because there are none… Yet we are brought up feeling separate, told we’re separate, told we’re “on our own”. How do you see people REALLY beginning to understand and KNOW this?
ROBIN: We humans are funny creatures. We want to have these amazing experiences, what I often hear people refer to as “altered states” of consciousness and being. Yet, more often than not we don’t want to give up the things that prevent us from experiencing life ecstatically, magically, and wholly, where we lose all illusion of separateness.
I know this may not be what people want to hear, but I think one of the most powerful things we can do is look at our addictions. Addictions can be subtle. We usually think of alcohol and drugs, but there are many more addictions: food, caffeine, emotional drama, TV, power, sex (particularly sex that involves no interaction such as computer or magazine porn), a need to constantly be talking on the phone, or chatting on Facebook or Twitter. There are also things like always keeping busy, or constantly needing people around, or always feeling we have to solve someone elses problems, or spending money, or reading hundreds of books, and so on. I believe we each innately know what our addictions are. If we sit down, take a close inward look and be honest with ourselves, we will know. If we observe ourselves through our days and make a list of our addictions, we might be very surprised at how many we have.
I bring this up because one of the fastest ways I know to get close to life (and ourselves) is to strip away our addictions. One of the reasons my book is called, “ Naked in Eden ” is because I stripped away all that came between me and an intimate, firsthand, experiential relationship with life. We are afraid to do this kind of stripping because we’re left naked and exposed, and often confused and unknowing, anxious and fearful. Yet, greatness lies in this seemingly vulnerable place. It is where we stand naked before life and find out what we’re made of. We come face to face with the experience of being alive, of being here. It is again allowing nature/life to seep in.
We are so much more than our jobs, car, house, family routine, school, town, social clubs and events, the music we listen to and the TV we watch. We are SO MUCH MORE. To have this “more” we must take time out and stop. We must do things that break up our routine, that rattle us, and shatter our beliefs, do things that leave us floundering and unknowing, things that shift out perception. It’s a big world, and anything is possible. Anything. At any time.
The second thing that allows me to merge with all that exists (or the force of creation), is to allow myself to feel whatever I feel, and without ANY judgment. I am life itself, and if I am feeling something there is reason for it. So I let myself feel what I am feeling and simply observe it. I become the fascinated observer of myself and life.
Often our addictions are a way that we numb our feelings and ourselves. If we can allow ourselves to FEEL, we will come to know life. We will BECOME life. Life is emotion continually expressing itself in infinite creative form. We have the potential to merge with the great conversation in a dance of ecstasy. In this place we can create anything. All things are possible. There are no limits. Living thusly is well worth shedding every addiction known to humans.
JENNY: Such POWERFUL and beautiful words to end with Robin! Thank you Robin. Your book, “ Naked in Eden ” moved me deeply. I was blown away by your bravery dealing with some of the creatures in the rainforest. I was touched by your healing and awakening as you were able to communicate with and KNOW nature. I was touched by your relationship with Ian and how well you communicated your emotions about the past as well as the present. Your book is a gift to the world Robin. Thank you for sharing it with the world. I wish you huge success with it and much love and happiness for all your days.
Please leave comments for Robin, check out her blog and read her amazing book, “ Naked In Eden “. Any interaction with this amazingly authentic and beautiful woman is inspiring and life changing!