Compassion -- Use it to Heal Others as You Heal Yourself in the Process
Posted Aug 26 2008 11:22am
Albert of Urban Monk told me of a competition he and 2 o the r monks are having giving bloggers the opportunity to write about "Compassion". I jumped at the opportunity because compassion is one of the only emotions I can honestly say I have never been without. This is a joint effort by the Three Monks – Wade of The Middle Way , Kenton of Zen-Inspired Self Development , and Albert of Urban Monk.Net . The prizes of NOW watches are kindly provided by the coolest timepiece company ever – The Now Watch .
Growing up in NYC with my young parents gave me a ton of opportunities to observe people and situations. My parents had me when the y were 18 and worked while going to college to ensure I had every opportunity available. We didn't have it easy but I don't ever remember seeing us as having it badly ei the r. Love was always given to me by my parents, the ir many friends and all our relatives. Always feeling loved and taken care of opened me up to feel compassion for o the rs.
I love the following quote that I think sums up compassion well:
"Compassion is that which makes the heart of the good move at the pain of o the rs. It crushes and destroys the pain of o the rs; thus, it is called compassion. It is called compassion because it shelters and embraces the distressed." - The Buddha
I grew up walking around NYC and seeing all kinds of people. People wearing fur coats, homeless people with no shoes and everyone in between. My parents were always very mindful to point out the re were a lot of people far worse off than us. I grew up knowing having money wasn't everything and that a lot of people with money had problems as well. I was the one in class that wanted to be friends with everyone. I did not believe in labels as " the fat kid, the dork, etc.". I saw everyone as people and every person as having value. I got insulted by some of the "popular kids" for being friends with the "unpopular" but that just made me realize the y were probably not the kids I wanted to be good friends with. Yes, the kids in the tattered uniforms might not look as polished as the ones in the consistently pressed ones -- but that didn't mean the y were any more or less of a good person. In fact, I realized early on some of the "most popular" kids were meaner than the not as popular. I was friends with all from the diplomat's daughter to the family of 6 that lived in a one bedroom apartment in NYC. I believe seeing value in every single person and knowing all were special also helped keep compassion consistent in my life.
I always seemed to be the one my friends came to with troubles because I would always want to listen and make the m feel better. I always wanted to "fix things" and make people smile. I would try and make my friends laugh, distract the m with fun and go through the possible options for making the ir situation better. In camp I was always given the title "sweetest or most compassionate camper". When I was a teenager I wanted to become a psychologist so I could help o the rs. I always felt it was a strength of mine to not only empathize or feel compassion but really want to understand the problem and offer viable solutions. I always wanted my friends to see the best in the mselves and realize how wonderful the y were. Friends have always been a great source of strength to me even though it was always rare for me to open up and I got most of my joy from helping or just having fun.
As an adult I continued to attract some friends that needed help and wanted to come to me for advice. I also learned how to open up a bit more myself and allow o the rs to offer me compassion. When I became ill I was involved in a lot of chronic pain, chronic illness and disease and disorder forums. I felt very sad as I heard the voluminous stories and even though I was in pain as well -- I always wanted to offer encouraging words and tell people it would get better.
Through my healing I realized what my life purpose is. I want to teach o the rs how to use the mind/body connection and the law of attraction to heal and feel as good as the y can. I can clearly remember joining forums and meeting tons of people that had given up because doctors told the m the y would get worse. My doctors told me the same thing. If I had listened and just "managed my pain by prescription drugs" I would be in very bad shape right now instead of celebrating my one year of health (January). I want to connect with people in chronic pain and tell the m that the re are ways to heal and natural ways to manage the ir pain. I can relate to what people in chronic pain feel -- the helplessness, the endless tests, the poor self worth, the "missing out", the worry of worse health conditions, the never-ending PAIN, the guilt of not being able to do more….. I want to show those in chronic pain that even if the y don't heal 100% the y can make the ir life a lot better and it can still be VERY WORTH LIVING.
So how do I show my compassion to people in pain? Anyway I can. I've given away as many e-books as I have sold. I've emailed back and forth with people tons of times without asking for anything. I've allowed myself to be open for all kinds of questions when people read my e-book or have any questions at all about mind/body or law of attraction healing. I actively go on forums and look for people that I can help. I am always looking into alternative methods of healing to write about so my readers can be informed.
What do I get in return? I've gotten at least 10 people telling me I have changed the ir lives so far. I have testimonials from people who have loved my e-book. I get emails from people asking me to talk to the ir son/daughter who are ill and inspire the m. I get to feel so ALIVE because I have helped o the rs and feeling the ir joy is payment enough.
I have also passed this trait onto my children and am so proud when I hear my son's teachers say just how compassionate he is. I hear that he is very concerned with how o the rs are feeling in his class, he always makes sure to call on everyone when given the opportunity and that he wants no one to feel left out. I am very proud of Alex and know he will help me show his younger sister the joy of being compassionate and helping o the rs as well.
Compassion is to want to help o the rs without desiring or expecting ANYTHING in return. When you help someone out of compassion and receive the ir gratitude -- you have not only helped to heal that person but you will also feel healed from deeply within as well. I believe life is about helping o the rs and sharing love and knowledge with as many as possible. Thank you Albert for giving me this topic to write about. I am passionate about compassion!