Alas, a day we thought we'd never survive to see...
I was certain, after carrying you for nine months, that life wouldn't be boring. My first pregnancy was so easy and quiet, but not you! You kicked and screamed whilst still in the womb! Oh yes, we always knew that it would be you, and not the sweet Hermit, who would be the nail in our coffin, the signer of the old person's home commitment form.
We salute you...
the only baby who could work a onesie. You,
oh giver of endless grief
holder of the title of loudest screaming banshee,
lover of apple jammies and
current resident of the nastiest bedroom.
You, oh chewer of books, lover of all things ironic, beacon of hope.