I don't know why I choose to torture myself with these things, but here I am. In my most wonderful wisdom, I decided to look up CFS and pregnancy . It's not looking good, from that article. Granted, low sample numbers, but still. 50% get worse in one study. Yikes.
Ok, not pregnant! Just thinking ahead for what life holds and all those moments in life I thought I'd experience in a 'normal' way once upon a time. When planning out my life, I always thought I'd have kids around 30. By that time I'd have chosen a career, have been somewhat established enough to start a family, and move forward with life. Now...well, now I'm still stuck on that career part. And even that I can't even figure out because I need to focus on getting better. Can't devote any energy to worrying about forging ahead with career options and figuring out that part of my life. And maybe now that part will never get figured out anyway. I'm starting to feel like I'm going to have to set some serious priorities. Can't consider ANYTHING else and devote everything to getting better somehow so I can at least do other things, like have a family. Agh, the thought of it would be intimidating minus the CFS! And what if the pregnancy triggers a relapse, or what if my children end up having it somehow. What if I can't muster the strength to take care of my own children? So maybe plans for being a successful, driven person may have to fall to the wayside in pursuit of other goals. Hm. I will just have to learn to be OK with that at some point I guess.
Anyway, like I said, don't know why I torture myself with these things! Should have simply not googled it when the thought struck me. I still have 5ish years to really start worrying about it I guess. Who knows what will happen by that point.