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Overtired, Overwhelmed, Over the Top

Posted May 18 2012 3:47pm
Sorry things have been so quiet here at my blog.  That is in direct contrast to the way things have been in my REAL life lately!  As many of you already know, I have been frantically busy with end-of-school stuff, soccer, school play, graduation preparation, and visitors, in addition to all the usual stuff in a family dealing with chronic illnesses.

I have been really pushing myself past my limits lately, pretty much every day.  I rarely get even an hour of quiet time to myself (Jamie is working with his tutor right now, and Craig is still at school), and I haven't been getting enough sleep, either.  You all know what happens when someone with CFS just keeps pushing, despite the warning signs to slow down.

I felt awful yesterday, but my husband was coming home from a business trip, my mom was already here, her husband due to arrive today, and my brother-in-law, niece, and nephew tomorrow.  So, I pushed myself (again) and went to the grocery store.  Yes, I know I shouldn't have, but I did.  And then I made dinner, too.  Of course, I felt even worse later.  I know I was cranky and out of sorts with my family - I was just so far past the point of exhaustion.

So, despite desperately needing sleep, I slept restlessly last night (one of the divine ironies of CFS).  I finally woke fully at about 5 am and couldn't get back to sleep because my mind was reeling, not only with things I needed to do but also with all sorts of obsessive rants - you know how that happens when you're spiraling downward?  I moved to the basement - wonderfully dark and quiet and freezing cold (I am always waking up during the night feeling overheated).  I got a few more hours sleep there and let me husband get my son out the door this morning.

Of course, I am pretty badly crashed today.  I finally got the message and have been trying to rest.  We still have waves of visitors coming in.  Craig has the lead in his middle school musical, The Pirates of Penzance, so the family are coming in to town for this weekend's performances.

I am planning to order Chinese take-out for dinner tonight, and we're having simple make-your-own soft tacos tomorrow night.  I am teachable; it just sometimes takes me a while :)

I have vowed not to overdo again, but I probably will with graduation in 2 weeks and vacation another week after that (which I have not even begun to plan yet!).  I just wanted to check in here briefly and say hello.  Hope everyone has a good weekend!
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