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Oh crap.

Posted Jan 26 2010 12:00am
I saw my new doctor yesterday afternoon. He gave me a short quiz to fill in to determine the severity of my depression. I scored 21 out of 27. I'm already on a list for counselling so we've upped my antidepressant dose and now it's a question of watch and wait.

I've been dogged by depression all my life. It's a bit of a revolving door process. When I'm OK I forget to manage it. I reduce my medication, I leave counselling - or am urged to leave. It's very difficult to get a long term view on it. I reckon I'm on a seven year cycle, which makes me about due. The last episode coincided, as this one has, with a short period of enormous change. And it saw the onset of my CFS/ME.

The doc asked me about triggers yesterday. He carefully sidestepped my mentioning CFS and only really engaged with my responses about relocation and relationship changes. I suspect he may be a 'non-believer', or, to give him the benefit of the doubt, there is nothing much he can do for my chronic fatigue but he knows how to treat depression.

I'm happy to go along with that for the moment. As Cusp commented on my last, it's very difficult to sort out what is depression and what is CFS/ME. This particular episode is manifesting very physically and we are treating it in a physical way with chemicals. It may be . . . and this is a wild hope . . . it may be that my ME has been improving whilst my depression has been deepening.

Has anyone done any research on the comorbidity of CFS/ME and depression? Yes, it stands to reason you get depressed if CFS cuts you down but I was thinking more along the physical symptoms. My concentration is too shot really to be exploring this right now but maybe someone has some thoughts on it.

I'd like to say thank you so much for your sustaining feedback. If you follow me on Facebook I'm not getting too much into it there because it is so much more public. But I'm grateful for your comments and remarks in both arenas.

Watch this space! Jo's mojo is MIA but not for much longer.
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