I'm having the inevitable flat time after so much activity last week and this. We spent Thursday viewing houses, just getting a feel for what was around and the area we want to finally settle in. We saw one lovely house which was just a bit too expensive, but I was in love. A's ex has kicked off again this week which has added to the general feeling of stress and angst. And A is off tomorrow for a week's training for his new job, back next weekend, then off again for another week.
My swabs from Monday came back negative but I'm still feeling quite rough. I've had a sore throat for nearly a month now with the white spots. The doc said yesterday I was running a slight fever and it was hard to tell if the sore throat was viral or bacterial. We discussed the possibility of more abx and decided against them as they upset my natural flora and fauna so much. We also talked about the amount of stress I was under.
I'm aware that sore throats are part of CFS/ME but I've not been troubled by them up until now. I think it is the result of a virus I had. I thought I was getting a cold a little while ago, but I never know these days as I don't get the full blown symptoms.
Talking of viruses . . . . I have mixed feelings about the news. (See Chronic Fatigue Syndrome is Over on CFS Warrior's blog). This seems to be so widely reported and such BIG news I'm almost tempted to believe it. I can hear Dick Van Dyke singing "Wouldn't it be lurverly". I've read most posts about this through tears. It would be lurverly to be able to get tested and for someone to say, yes, you have it. At least all those doctors who regard one as a 'heartsink' patient would have something to try.
But what about new stigmas? My first thought was for my nearest and dearest. Have I transmitted it to them in any way? Will people regard me as infectious? I know I have HPV - a sexually transmitted virus. Is it the same? Will people think I've slept around? Well I have, but that's beside the point.
Why am I finding it so hard to see the upside of this news?
I suppose because, for the moment, it doesn't change anything. It is very hopeful for the future, and for those that come after us. It will take a while for other research to be done and for a link to be proven. Then there will be treatment regimes to be trialled. Then, if we are to get treatment on the NHS, the new protocols have to be accepted etc etc.
Thanks to the hard work of campaigners there is much impetus behind finding a cause and treatment for CFS/ME or XAND is it may come to be known. And, as this retrovirus may be behind other conditions, there would be a very wide benefit from research and treatment trials. So I am comforted by the thought that this research won't fall by the wayside.
But it ain't over, as they say, until the fat lady sings.