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Having Visitors

Posted Aug 11 2008 9:07pm


My new neighbour friend, J left message on my phone to see how I was doing on Sunday. My answering machine is not good. It takes message, but I cannot monitor who is calling. The quality of the recording is bad and I usually cannot understand half of the message… It didn’t bother me as I only had phone calls from telemarketers, charity organisations, or debt collectors as someone I don’t know gave my number to them… I learned not to answer home phone to conserve my energy and I will stick to it. Medical Centre and hospitals have my mobile phone number.

When I was able to move comfortably and when my brain started functioning comfortably in the afternoon, I phoned him back to let him know that I was okay. I also asked if J & K would like to come over for coffee if they were not busy.

I wanted to keep the positive thing going. If I waited little longer, I would feel uncomfortable to invite them. I also wanted to get to know them more as they are lovely people.

K came over first as J had to go out. We had lovely and meaningful talk and I saw where her compassion and kindness were coming from. She continued complementing me, but was very shy about receiving my complements to her. The more I talked with her, the more I liked her.

I also learned how other neighbours are like. They are not nice people at all and it is better for me to stay away from them.

My next door is a racist. They couldn’t get alone with other side of neighbour and threatened to kill them… Neighbourhood watch people got involved and ended up removing the Islander neighbours from the street. It was a shocking news for me. However, it explained the reason why they avoided saying hello to me and even completely ignored me when I was out to check letterbox.

This news made me realise that my front neighbour is even more racist. I heard her screaming and shouting at a young teenage body (Islander). If I move all the “f” words from her sentence, she was yelling at him “I’ll pop your head off!” She was also shouting and yelling at young girl from other family (Islander). The nasty woman ended up calling a police (well, this was different as people called police few times to check on their house), and little girl was very upset. I saw J comforting the little girl, then the girl came to me and explained what the nasty woman did to her. I assured the girl that there was nothing she needed to worry about if she didn’t do anything wrong, and to keep her chin up. These children were just doing what children supposed to do, playing on the street…

Then one afternoon when I was very sick and couldn’t leave my bed, I heard big commotion happening outside. The girl’s mother was crying, “My child! Oh, my child!” There were some screaming and shouting going at the same time. I assumed the front neighbour physically assaulted the girl.

I don’t see/hear the girl or any other children on the street anymore. So I assume that the girl’s family has moved away as well. This is really a shame. I saw the young teenager boy on the way to doctor’s appointment. I noticed he had manners and he was looking after younger children on the street. The girl was just being a child. She didn’t do anything particular to annoy us. They both looked smart beautiful children. I hate to think the negative effect this may have caused to those young children.

J & K’s other side of neighbour is not nice, either. She maliciously reported them to RSPCA for animal cruelty. But J & K were only giving the quality time to their sick cat to enjoy the rest of her time. The cat was not in pain. Because of the report, J & K had to take the sick but happy cat to a vet and put her down. K cried as she wanted the cat to have peaceful end at her own home with J & K, not on the cold exam table at the vet. Their cat had even healthy heart and her passing away was long sad one.

J & K are the last people to be cruel to anything. All the neighbour had to do was to talk to them and understand the situation before she falsely reports them.

Now I know that I have two extremely nice neighbours and bunch of really nasty ones…


We had girls talk. K asked me if I wanted to meet someone. Well, when I was in a bad marriage and even for a while after I left it, I didn’t want to have any relationship. As I have peace in my life now and slowly settling into my “new” life, I am slowly starting to feel I want to have someone special in my life.

Having said that, I know very well how impossible it is to meet someone special. First of all, I’m house bound and mainly bedridden, there is no chance for me to meet anyone. Even if I get to meet someone, how many people can accept a person who is sick and has major limitation in her life? I cannot contribute anything to his life. Who would be willing to share his life with such burden?

K has a different view. She believes that I’m a treasure to anybody and whoever becomes my special one in life will be a very lucky man. *Blush*

I believe in the magic this universe performs. Even I have been invisible to the world, I made some good online friends, I met a caring doctor, and I now have good neighbour friends. When I was going through tough times, there were always some help given to me. I’ve never been homeless, or I’ve never been bankrupted. Also the meeting of my lovely neighbour friends, J and K, can only be explained as fate. I believe that it is possible that one day I will meet the special person and have happy life with him. He needs to feel he is on the top of the world just being with me. My limitation and sickness will not be an issue to him. And I want to be able to look at each other’s eyes and smile at each other after long years of being together, just like J and K do.

K was wondering how to give me chances of meeting people. It seems like it is her personal mission to make it happen. I smiled, but I know that the time line for the miracle to happen is much longer term than what’s in her mind. Miracles happened to me before, so it will happen again. However, there is no guarantee. It is more likely that I will spend the rest of my life as single. I keep the delicate balance between hope and reality, and take thing as it comes. After all, no-relationship is much better than bad relationship.

K was also nice to my dogs, Poppy and Basil.

Basil was very shy and just didn’t leave my lap. K commented that in Basil’s mind, he was protecting me. This made me laugh. He gets scared very easily. He gets freaked out by own reflection on the window at night. He might chase a cat, but runs right back to me if the cat stops and look at him. But once he gets used to a person, he gets very attached to the person and would not come back to me until the person leaves. I can tell this will happen soon. He will be sitting on K’s lap and will not move until she goes home.

Poppy liked K, although she was little grumpy occasionally. She doesn’t like people touching certain part of her body. She’s been through two big operations. First she had slashed ligament in her back leg. She had to have a pin in her leg to keep it together. After about 4 months of huge bandage and “supposed to be” no moving around, we went out to back yard and played fetch. Then, her spinal disc popped out. Within two days of not knowing what was wrong with her at local vet clinic, and progression of paralysis and upsets, she was rushed to Small Animal Specialist Hospital to have emergency operation. Some people told me to put her down and get another dog. I just cannot do that. It was an awful & chilling suggestion people made.

When she walks, she limps a little. When she runs, her back legs swing up high and look very funny as she has no feelings in her hip area. But it doesn’t make any difference to her quality of life. She can still run and fetch balls with big grin on her face.

When J arrived, I needed to give a little caution as Poppy and Basil don’t like males. Especially Poppy, her attitude changes from cute little dog to guard dog… When she has that attitude, she often mistakes someone try to pat her as someone try to hit her. So I needed to warn them to put their hand from under when they try to touch her.

Poppy can be ready to kill in a second if a man tries to harm me. Sadly this is a left over trauma from our past. She still shakes violently with fear when a door smash shut by wind, or even it just rattles. Then she keeps her eyes at the door with fear and shakes as if a ghost is about jump out from the door. When she gets into guard dog mode, she barks like a mad dog if someone makes sudden move to hug me. She thinks I was being attacked. She is a nice friendly dog. She just needs to know and be assured that nobody is going to hurt me now.

Basil, on the other hand, he will never leave my lap. He keeps his eyes on the man from the distance, and barks crazy at him when he moves just a little bit, such as pick up his coffee mug…

J & K weren’t upset by my dogs’ behaviour and understood the reason why they suddenly acted like guard dogs. J, K and I are confident that Poppy and Basil will be friends with J soon. J has special energy that animals trust him. K told me the magical moment he touched a wild bull in the moon light.

K left before J to let their dogs out from their bed room. Since they have new leather lounge set, they wanted to be cautious. It reminded me when Poppy chewed through all my shoes when she was a puppy. And I still keep some of good shoes that have bits of Basil’s teeth marks. They behave well now, and they will not touch any of my staff. They can even tell the difference between old socks I gave them as toys and decent socks I still wear.

J is a calm person and peace lover. He tries to stay away from people arguing and debating over some little things. However, if he find someone is bushing his wife, he will be there to teach him a lesson. He is a typical old school boy. Well, my understanding of the old school boys is the men who were educated at Christian grammar school, and pursued careers in marketing. They have good people skill and keep diaries. And they hate accountants with passion. Well, they used to have generous marketing account from company and entertained their clients to sell. Then know-it-all-but-have-no-idea accountants took control over the company and took away their generous marketing account and joy at work. I guess I don’t look like the know-it-all-but-have-no-idea accountant; therefore, they rather enjoy teasing me and giving me hard time.

When his 8 work mates suddenly died from heart attack within a year, he refused the promotion and resigned from the company. He knew it was the time to change his life style. He does know what are the most important things in life, love & health.

After J left, I was still feeling extremely happy from another successful meeting with them. I wish I could do this more often.

The next day, I was hit by bad payback and couldn’t leave my bed for three days. So, probably I cannot have the lovely coffee time with them as often as I wish. However, it is still wonderful to have friends who share the same value of life with me.

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