D-Day came on September 25th, except I was the German soldier yelling cupping his crotch and yelling "Save My Privates!!" instead of the lucky American getting picked for the incroyable faux mission to save Private Ryan. D for Denied. Destroyed. Denigrated to litigation.
For a brief background, I had spent the first 6 months of 2008 working on a 100+ page, supposedly-waterproof, appeal for my long-term disability (LTD) benefits. I had traveled across the country to collect the best objective medical evidence money could buy. My lawyer was just as surprised and disappointed in my outcome as I was, and my consultant nearly broke down in tears as my LTD company, in an unrepentant instant, tainted her flawless record with helping disabled claimants win their appeals.
First and foremost, I needed my benefits so that I could relieve the financial strain I'd incurred on my family. I bless my sister's heart for being so talented as to get a full ride to music school. Otherwise, I honestly think we'd have to sell our house (although my parents would never admit it.) Pardon the selfishness. But let's be actuarial for a moment: even if we lost our house, we'd still be in far better shape than the majority of claimants.
That's where I feel like I need to sharpen my teeth a la McCain did before he realized he better leave his 71-yr old teeth alone.
I consider myself a patient seeking appropriate treatment for my condition recommended by my physicians. Nothing less, nothing more. The costs probably range from $6,000-$10,000/year. Go ahead, roll your eyes and compare me to a mother on welfare having kids to justify "what's necessary." But I guarantee you, speak with any CFIDS patient that honestly feels he/she is able to make headway in treatment with an illness lacking a single therapy that's gotten so much as a wink from the FDA, and you'll get the same ballpark figure.
How can patients living on their own and/or those lacking financial support from spouses or family ever expect to receive proper treatment, and not just zoned out on Rx drugs in place of an opportunity to live out their lives with dignity, if LTD companies are allowed to make a habit outta denying even the strongest and most convincing of appeals?? They can't. With the small amounts of money paid via social security, patients may be given the means to live but no hope with which to live and pursue a brighter future. And let's not forget, it takes an average of 2-3 years to receive social security benefits, and another 2 years to qualify to Medicare.
I wasn't angry for me when I received the D-Day email from my apologetic lawyer. I was a little surprised, but it really wasn't unexpected. After all, life with CFIDS has transformed social, medical, and now legal hurdles into a Great Wall I never expect to see the tail end of. But let's be undiplomatic for a second and realize that those Mongols might have thought about using grappling hooks and a ladder. With nothing given and everything to fight for, what is the rush of success but drowning out the halitosis of failure with Listerine?
I've been spoiled enough in this lifetime to have reaped most fruits of my labor before getting sick. On D-Day, I finally lucked out by getting cheated out of something I put my health on the line for, and for once I can say I was failed miserably by our justice system. Yet instead of being angry and indignant, I choose to put my faith in veritas et aequitas. I'm sure you've rolled your eyes so many times your eyeballs hurt. Well it's not because I feel weak, powerless, desperate for a higher calling. If that were the case, I might have become religious since I got sick. No, I will put my faith in truth and justice because no one else will fight for the underserved unless they're running a campaign with as high a rhetoric as a budget spent on negative attack ads. By throwing myself a rope of faith to prevent falling through yet another crack in the system, I just might be able to sway a judge's future decisions. A win for one claimant is a win for every wrongfully-denied claimant. A win for me means others that are sick and tired still might muster the strength to fight for their rights because my and others' victories are in the back of their foggy minds. Even for the most rational of minds, faith can't be toggled back and forth with rationality and unlikely odds of winning. I will have faith in the judge, future judges, the departments of insurance, policy-makers, and law-makers, because I need to believe they can be moved and shaken an inch at a time.
So I will see you in court, you soulless bastards.
For a brief background, I had spent the first 6 months of 2008 working on a 100+ page, supposedly-waterproof, appeal for my long-term disability (LTD) benefits. I had traveled across the country to collect the best objective medical evidence money could buy. My lawyer was just as surprised and disappointed in my outcome as I was, and my consultant nearly broke down in tears as my LTD company, in an unrepentant instant, tainted her flawless record with helping disabled claimants win their appeals.
First and foremost, I needed my benefits so that I could relieve the financial strain I'd incurred on my family. I bless my sister's heart for being so talented as to get a full ride to music school. Otherwise, I honestly think we'd have to sell our house (although my parents would never admit it.) Pardon the selfishness. But let's be actuarial for a moment: even if we lost our house, we'd still be in far better shape than the majority of claimants.
That's where I feel like I need to sharpen my teeth a la McCain did before he realized he better leave his 71-yr old teeth alone.
I consider myself a patient seeking appropriate treatment for my condition recommended by my physicians. Nothing less, nothing more. The costs probably range from $6,000-$10,000/year. Go ahead, roll your eyes and compare me to a mother on welfare having kids to justify "what's necessary." But I guarantee you, speak with any CFIDS patient that honestly feels he/she is able to make headway in treatment with an illness lacking a single therapy that's gotten so much as a wink from the FDA, and you'll get the same ballpark figure.
How can patients living on their own and/or those lacking financial support from spouses or family ever expect to receive proper treatment, and not just zoned out on Rx drugs in place of an opportunity to live out their lives with dignity, if LTD companies are allowed to make a habit outta denying even the strongest and most convincing of appeals?? They can't. With the small amounts of money paid via social security, patients may be given the means to live but no hope with which to live and pursue a brighter future. And let's not forget, it takes an average of 2-3 years to receive social security benefits, and another 2 years to qualify to Medicare.
I wasn't angry for me when I received the D-Day email from my apologetic lawyer. I was a little surprised, but it really wasn't unexpected. After all, life with CFIDS has transformed social, medical, and now legal hurdles into a Great Wall I never expect to see the tail end of. But let's be undiplomatic for a second and realize that those Mongols might have thought about using grappling hooks and a ladder. With nothing given and everything to fight for, what is the rush of success but drowning out the halitosis of failure with Listerine?
I've been spoiled enough in this lifetime to have reaped most fruits of my labor before getting sick. On D-Day, I finally lucked out by getting cheated out of something I put my health on the line for, and for once I can say I was failed miserably by our justice system. Yet instead of being angry and indignant, I choose to put my faith in veritas et aequitas. I'm sure you've rolled your eyes so many times your eyeballs hurt. Well it's not because I feel weak, powerless, desperate for a higher calling. If that were the case, I might have become religious since I got sick. No, I will put my faith in truth and justice because no one else will fight for the underserved unless they're running a campaign with as high a rhetoric as a budget spent on negative attack ads. By throwing myself a rope of faith to prevent falling through yet another crack in the system, I just might be able to sway a judge's future decisions. A win for one claimant is a win for every wrongfully-denied claimant. A win for me means others that are sick and tired still might muster the strength to fight for their rights because my and others' victories are in the back of their foggy minds. Even for the most rational of minds, faith can't be toggled back and forth with rationality and unlikely odds of winning. I will have faith in the judge, future judges, the departments of insurance, policy-makers, and law-makers, because I need to believe they can be moved and shaken an inch at a time.
So I will see you in court, you soulless bastards.