It was very cold and raining on Thursday. Miserable was good word to explain the day.
I had a doctor’s appointment in the late afternoon. Because of the rain, I could not use my wheelchair, so it was going to be only doctor’s appointment, nothing else.
Because it was miserable day, I expected that the doctor wouldn’t be too busy. People would prefer to stay at home on such cold and wet day. But obviously I assumed wrong. Now that he practice 4 days there, patients from his other clinic are coming to see him there. Probably the cold winter weather is making people sick as well.
The two couches in the waiting room were both occupied, so I asked for a place to lie down.
Although he had a long busy day, Dr TL greeted me with warm smile.
As I expected, my weight went down a bit due to gastro problem. Or, should I say, due to temporarily relief from constipation. He was going to prescribe me the best pain medicine for gastro problems, but I interrupted him and told him it might not necessary now. Since the worst of the gastro pain had past, I would feel better from the gastro problem in couple of days. Since I didn’t bring my wheelchair the day, I could not go to Chemist. And it would be another few days before I could go out.
He was concerned that bad gastro pain would make me even more fatigued. He tried to explain that having ME/CFS is bad enough; therefore, he wanted to relief any pain/symptoms where it’s possible. I tried to explain to him that I do not worry about symptoms that appear only for couple of weeks. If I wait, they shall pass eventually. It is not permanent problem. If I was in the middle of the worst pain, I would have taken the prescription. But when I’m in the middle of the pain, I wouldn’t be able to go out to see a doctor, or go to Chemist to fill the prescription. So, usually my option for these acute symptoms is just wait and they will go away eventually. But it is comforting to know that there is a person who cares about my sufferings.
My cognitive function was not good that day; especially I hadn’t slept for nearly two days. So probably, my explanation didn’t make sense to him… I appreciate it very much for his willingness and efforts to help me for any problems. But I didn’t want to end up wasting his goodwill.
I was feeling that the gastro virus was slowly shifting to head cold. Since I’m already on paracetamol 24/7, and since it wasn’t too bad, I didn’t mention it.
He told me that the gastro virus I had was gastro-something-something. My brain just couldn’t remember it…
The first time he checked, my blood pressure was high. He checked again, and it was normal. I explained that my BP readings change very often. Last year, I had rather low and consistent BP, but this year, it is getting towards rather high and sometimes it shoots up. He assured me that I didn’t need to worry about it as it is natural for BP to change all the time and for my height (168 cm) the reading is still normal.
Then subject moved to sleep problem I am having. Although this should be the issue I need to focus, nothing worked to improve the condition for me. Since my life is on hold anyway, I just go with the flow and sleep whenever my body allows me to. This way, I can have the best quality sleep I could within my limitation and allow me to do more things while I am awake. He asked if sleep problem is common with ME/CFS. I explained that CFS specialist would tackle the sleep problem first. And I added that my problem is too stubborn so there’s no point trying it. It feels like my autonomic switch is half broken and my body doesn’t recognise day or night. My day cycle seems longer than 24 hours. It is more like 26 or 28 hours. However, after exertion, I tend to have bad insomnia and sometimes I cannot sleep for couple of days.
He asked me what I tried to improve sleep so far. I mentioned sun light, and few different sleeping tablets. One of them was Stilnox/Ambien. I cannot remember others. I was told by psychiatrists that I wasn’t taking them properly. But it didn’t make any difference even I strictly followed their instructions. And small amount of anti-depressants only made me really sick and more exhausted.
Then he asked if I tried antihistamine. I haven’t. It is not a prescription medicine, but should not be too expensive. And it is safe enough for a pregnant woman to take. He’s written down the name of the medicine for me. When I looked at it, he asked if I could read his hand writing. Well, my brain just couldn’t take any information that time. Even he had written it down clearly, it wouldn’t have sunk into my brain. And even I see a familiar word; it wouldn’t make sense to my brain. So I would just give it to the pharmacist and he would know what it is.
If you would like to try antihistamine for your sleep problems, I suggest to talk to your doctor first. I googled the name of the medicine, and there are some people getting adverse reaction from it. And if you are on anti-depressants, pharmacist wouldn’t give it to you.
I felt it might work for me because when I use antihistamine cream for my skin irritation, I felt easier to fell asleep. So it is worth to give it a try. When I can go out again, I shall get the medicine. And I will set my ideal sleep hours…, something like 11 pm to 12 pm. Then try to follow the routine for a while, and see how I feel.
If I could have the routine and still feel the same, it will be great. If I could have the routine but I feel more exhausted, maybe it wouldn’t be so great, because I still need to get a few housekeeping duties done between the sleeps.
Dr TL checked my chest sound and it was good. He also checked my abdomen and kidney(?) because we discussed about constipation. He asked about my dogs. And that was my fortnightly holistic medical consultation.
He made me feel I was special and I was important. He is a great anti-depressant for me. No wonder he is loved by his patients.
It’s nearly a year since I had the first appointment with him. I had not been seeing any doctor for a while, and I was petrified to find a doctor in new place. It was a great relief to know that there is a doctor like him. It was more like miracle to me. He restored hope in me.
During the year, my doctor/patient partnership became solid. I no longer worry about him turning into the doctor I used to know. I am confident that he is not pretending, but his care and compassion are genuine. I am so confident that I could handle it even if he gives me stigmatised diagnosis, because it is for me to get better. (as a hypothetic example…) Diagnosis is for treatment to get better.
I am blessed to have a compassionate doctor like him. And it has been giving positive effect to my life.
It was very cold and raining on Thursday. Miserable was good word to explain the day.
I had a doctor’s appointment in the late afternoon. Because of the rain, I could not use my wheelchair, so it was going to be only doctor’s appointment, nothing else.
Because it was miserable day, I expected that the doctor wouldn’t be too busy. People would prefer to stay at home on such cold and wet day. But obviously I assumed wrong. Now that he practice 4 days there, patients from his other clinic are coming to see him there. Probably the cold winter weather is making people sick as well.
The two couches in the waiting room were both occupied, so I asked for a place to lie down.
Although he had a long busy day, Dr TL greeted me with warm smile.
As I expected, my weight went down a bit due to gastro problem. Or, should I say, due to temporarily relief from constipation. He was going to prescribe me the best pain medicine for gastro problems, but I interrupted him and told him it might not necessary now. Since the worst of the gastro pain had past, I would feel better from the gastro problem in couple of days. Since I didn’t bring my wheelchair the day, I could not go to Chemist. And it would be another few days before I could go out.
He was concerned that bad gastro pain would make me even more fatigued. He tried to explain that having ME/CFS is bad enough; therefore, he wanted to relief any pain/symptoms where it’s possible. I tried to explain to him that I do not worry about symptoms that appear only for couple of weeks. If I wait, they shall pass eventually. It is not permanent problem. If I was in the middle of the worst pain, I would have taken the prescription. But when I’m in the middle of the pain, I wouldn’t be able to go out to see a doctor, or go to Chemist to fill the prescription. So, usually my option for these acute symptoms is just wait and they will go away eventually. But it is comforting to know that there is a person who cares about my sufferings.
My cognitive function was not good that day; especially I hadn’t slept for nearly two days. So probably, my explanation didn’t make sense to him… I appreciate it very much for his willingness and efforts to help me for any problems. But I didn’t want to end up wasting his goodwill.
I was feeling that the gastro virus was slowly shifting to head cold. Since I’m already on paracetamol 24/7, and since it wasn’t too bad, I didn’t mention it.
He told me that the gastro virus I had was gastro-something-something. My brain just couldn’t remember it…
The first time he checked, my blood pressure was high. He checked again, and it was normal. I explained that my BP readings change very often. Last year, I had rather low and consistent BP, but this year, it is getting towards rather high and sometimes it shoots up. He assured me that I didn’t need to worry about it as it is natural for BP to change all the time and for my height (168 cm) the reading is still normal.
Then subject moved to sleep problem I am having. Although this should be the issue I need to focus, nothing worked to improve the condition for me. Since my life is on hold anyway, I just go with the flow and sleep whenever my body allows me to. This way, I can have the best quality sleep I could within my limitation and allow me to do more things while I am awake. He asked if sleep problem is common with ME/CFS. I explained that CFS specialist would tackle the sleep problem first. And I added that my problem is too stubborn so there’s no point trying it. It feels like my autonomic switch is half broken and my body doesn’t recognise day or night. My day cycle seems longer than 24 hours. It is more like 26 or 28 hours. However, after exertion, I tend to have bad insomnia and sometimes I cannot sleep for couple of days.
He asked me what I tried to improve sleep so far. I mentioned sun light, and few different sleeping tablets. One of them was Stilnox/Ambien. I cannot remember others. I was told by psychiatrists that I wasn’t taking them properly. But it didn’t make any difference even I strictly followed their instructions. And small amount of anti-depressants only made me really sick and more exhausted.
Then he asked if I tried antihistamine. I haven’t. It is not a prescription medicine, but should not be too expensive. And it is safe enough for a pregnant woman to take. He’s written down the name of the medicine for me. When I looked at it, he asked if I could read his hand writing. Well, my brain just couldn’t take any information that time. Even he had written it down clearly, it wouldn’t have sunk into my brain. And even I see a familiar word; it wouldn’t make sense to my brain. So I would just give it to the pharmacist and he would know what it is.
If you would like to try antihistamine for your sleep problems, I suggest to talk to your doctor first. I googled the name of the medicine, and there are some people getting adverse reaction from it. And if you are on anti-depressants, pharmacist wouldn’t give it to you.
I felt it might work for me because when I use antihistamine cream for my skin irritation, I felt easier to fell asleep. So it is worth to give it a try. When I can go out again, I shall get the medicine. And I will set my ideal sleep hours…, something like 11 pm to 12 pm. Then try to follow the routine for a while, and see how I feel.
If I could have the routine and still feel the same, it will be great. If I could have the routine but I feel more exhausted, maybe it wouldn’t be so great, because I still need to get a few housekeeping duties done between the sleeps.
Dr TL checked my chest sound and it was good. He also checked my abdomen and kidney(?) because we discussed about constipation. He asked about my dogs. And that was my fortnightly holistic medical consultation.
He made me feel I was special and I was important. He is a great anti-depressant for me. No wonder he is loved by his patients.
It’s nearly a year since I had the first appointment with him. I had not been seeing any doctor for a while, and I was petrified to find a doctor in new place. It was a great relief to know that there is a doctor like him. It was more like miracle to me. He restored hope in me.
During the year, my doctor/patient partnership became solid. I no longer worry about him turning into the doctor I used to know. I am confident that he is not pretending, but his care and compassion are genuine. I am so confident that I could handle it even if he gives me stigmatised diagnosis, because it is for me to get better. (as a hypothetic example…) Diagnosis is for treatment to get better.
I am blessed to have a compassionate doctor like him. And it has been giving positive effect to my life.
Filed under: Doctors, ME/CFS