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A second chance?

Posted Sep 18 2012 9:34pm
I am now officially unemployed. My boyfriend accepted the job in northern california and we moved 400 miles, essentially pretty last minute, over this past weekend. Of course it was 98 degrees on the day that I had to do the most stressful last-minute packing. Needless to say, I am pretty beat after this whole ordeal and need some time to recover. My muscles are aching and burning, my joints hurt, and I'm just plain EXHAUSTED.  I think I was on the verge of completely collapsing on and off again for the last 4 days. Not fun.  Since the plan is to not work until I get better, I can rest rest rest guilt-free until I'm back to my baseline (well, sort of, if I ignore the overwhelming guilt of not working and being supported by my boyfriend). HOWEVER. I am quite impressed with what I did manage to do every day in the last week leading up to the move. I packed a substantial amount of stuff, all things considering, even while still going to work 4-5 hours a day! Crash aside, thank you antibiotics! Couldn't imagine having done any of that even like 3 months ago!

So what now? This is potentially my second chance at life. I will finally get a chance to try out my crack-pot theory that unlimited rest and the proper (but ever so difficult to achieve) balance of activity and rest will help me find the way out of this sad life. You know, that and a healthy daily dose of 2 antibiotics and an antiviral/Lyme cyst-buster :) Haha. Anyway, I'm going to put together a very strict, rigid activity schedule for myself that includes slow, incremental increases in activity from the bare minimum I can handle right now. This tactic has worked well for me in the past, and now that I am in an environment that I can fully control (ie, no more work and people hounding me to do things and be active to a level I  have little say over), I think it should be easier to slowly increase activity and stick to that plan.

I am truly very lucky to be in this situation and I really hope this financial and personal (pride, fulfillment, etc) sacrifice pays off in the end. I do have a lot of hard work ahead of me and, more than ever, I have to contain my urge to run off and do 5 million things, but instead stick to my plan. That's probably the hardest part of all. Staying within my limits and now being my own physical therapist. We'll see how it goes.

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