Moms killing kids not nearly as rare as we think-child abuse starts in the womb #prolife #parents #kids #abuse
Posted Apr 17 2011 2:38am
Recent headlines of mother's killing their children have been prominent lately in the mainstream news, yet the number of children's lives terminated in the womb before birth continues to go unnoticed by the majority of American's and news outlets.
While any kind of murder, suicide, abuse of a child is horrendous, I find the lack of attention to preventing and ending abortions even worse. There are nearly 3000 abortions per day in the US, most often on healthy fetus and healthy mother's who simply don't want the responsibility &commitment to carry her offspring for nine months.
Those who support abortion claim that more sex-education&access to contraceptives is necessary;yet this has increased since 1973 and the number of abortions have not decreased. There are more abortions performed now than before abortion was legalized and contraceptives are known to fail. Unless people can refrain from taking the risk of getting pregnant before they are ready to become parents the only guaranteed way to prevent unplanned pregnancies is to abstain.
The pro-choice movement claims this is impossible, yet many people and an increasing number of young people are abstaining from sex. Regardless if you choose to abstain or use birth control, the fact remains if and when you take the risk and become pregnant you need to take personal responsibility and be ready to parent or place the child for adoption because abortion is the inhumane choice.
Many pro-choice claim they support choice ie:parenting and adoption;yet the majority of them choose the less humane option and abort. Why is this?
While pregnancy is not always easy on a woman, due to physical demands, hormonal changes and emotional demands or family and career demands, it is the most unique and selfless thing a woman can do that men can't do, bring life into the world.
Yet the mother-child bond has become so easily broken when mother's are given the legal right to end their offspring's lives before they are born. How can this be humane in a civil society that wants to end child abuse and neglect? Recently a 25 year old mother in New York took her life and that of her three young children under five, while the oldest, the ten year old son was lucky to escape as the van submerged into the Hudson River. The question we all ask is...Why?
"How could she?"
It's the headline du jour whenever a horrific case emerges of a mother killing her kids, as Lashanda Armstrong did when she piled her children into her minivan and drove straight into the frigid Hudson River.Our shock at such stories is, of course, understandable: They seem to go against everything we intuitively feel about the mother-child bond.
But mothers kill their children in this country much more often than most people would realize by simply reading the headlines; by conservative estimates it happens every few days, at least 100 times a year.
Experts say more mothers than fathers kill their children under 5 years of age.
And some say our reluctance as a society to believe mothers would be capable of killing their offspring is hindering our ability to recognize warning signs, intervene and prevent more tragedies.
I would like to add, the problem of mother's killing their offspring starts in the womb. Women have been self-aborting or hiring abortionists to kill their offspring in the womb by the thousands for centuries. While abortion has been legalized in most countries since the 1970's, others have banned it like Chile,Ireland and Poland, where maternal mortality rates have gone down and pre-natal and post-natal care have improved. Sadly, in the United States since the passing of Roe V Wade in 1973, over 53 Million children have been purposely aborted because the mother conceived at a time she wasn't ready. According to Planned Parenthood statistics, around 98% of women who abort choose to abort a healthy fetus simply because they were not planning or ready to become a parent.
This horrendous number is indication of the worst form of abuse and neglect of the mother-child bond, beginning at the earliest stage of motherhood and human development. Until our country stops intentionally killing over 3000 human offspring every day, the abuse and killing of children outside the womb will continue by mother's and father's.
And so the problem remains.
"We've learned how to reduce auto fatalities among kids, through seatbelt use. We've learned how to stop kids from strangling on the strings of their hoodies. But with this phenomenon, we struggle," says Jill Korbin, an anthropologist at Case Western Reserve University who has studied mothers who kill children. "The solution is not so readily apparent."
How common is filicide, or killing one's child, among mothers? Finding accurate records is nearly impossible, experts say. One problem is classification: The legal disposition of these cases varies enormously. Also, many cases doubtless go unreported or undetected, such as very young mothers who kill their newborns by smothering them or drowning them in a toilet after hiding the entire pregnancy.
"I'd say a mother kills a child in this country once every three days, and that's a low estimate," says Cheryl Meyer, co-author of "Mothers Who Kill Their Children."
Several databases track such killings but do not separate mothers from fathers or stepfathers. At the Department of Health and Human Services, the National Child Abuse and Neglect Data System reported an estimated 1,740 child fatalities - meaning when a child dies from an injury caused by abuse or neglect - in 2008.
And according to numbers compiled from 16 states by the National Violent Death Reporting System at the CDC Injury Center, 130 children were killed in those states by a parent in 2008, the last year for which numbers were available.
"The horrific stories make the headlines, so we believe it hardly ever happens," says Meyer, a professor of psychology at Wright State University in Dayton, Ohio. "But it's not a rare thing."
Meyer and co-author Michelle Oberman interviewed women at the Ohio Reformatory for Women. They found that of 1,800 women at the prison, 80 were there for killing their children.
It's also a phenomenon that defies neat patterns: It cuts across boundaries of class, race and socio-economic status. Oberman and Meyer came up with five categories: filicide related to an ignored pregnancy; abuse-related; neglect-related; assisted or coerced filicide (such as when a partner forces the killing); and purposeful filicide with the mother acting alone.
Different as these cases are, though, there are some factors that link the poor teen mother who kills her baby in a bathroom with an older, wealthier mother, and one of them, experts say, is isolation.
"These women almost always feel alone, with a total lack of emotional support," says Lita Linzer Schwartz, a professor emeritus of psychology and women's studies at Penn State, and co-author of "Endangered Children."
Therefore, because mother's who kill their children after their born find themselves isolated or without a support system they end up taking their children's lives in hopes of saving them from further potential suffering. I have found this mentality is also a common belief in mother's of aborted babies. Many women I have chatted with say they aborted because they weren't ready to be a parent, often because they did not have the financial or emotional support of the father or her own family and friends.
In summary, until society works to encourage and helps support women in these situations they will continue to act in desperation. Abortion is a desperate act, just as suicide and filicide, the taking of one's children.
According to experts, and as mentioned later in the above article, many women who kill their own children also do it because they think they are being a "good mother" by protecting them from future harm or suffering. This is a fallacy and a selfish way to think about caring for your children. While those who are religious in some way might think they are sparing their kids for Heaven, they are not acting honorably in the name of God. Those who aren't religious should realize that if they truly believe we are given one life to live, then why not give everyone an equal right to live. Nobody knows what their future success will be, but if you at least strive to make the best of your life, your child is likely to follow in your footsteps.
Many will say, those who are born into poverty often grow up in poverty, but this cycle doesn't have to continue if children are raised to make something of themselves and they are encouraged and have mentors that are positive role models. Oprah Winfrey is an example of this, a woman who grew up in poverty and abuse but excelled and became her own brand and a successful talk show host and business woman.
We can't end a child's suffering or potential for struggles by taking their life from them at conception or beyond. For without life we have no rights and no opportunity to life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness as declared in our Constitution. But, we are all granted with an inalienable right to life and once that life is given we must respect all human life from conception to natural death. Until people learn to respect the value of all human life and honor their offspring in the womb and out of the womb the number of abortions, child abuse, neglect and filicide cases will decrease.