I had no idea this was going on! I had no idea that I was nominated! Well, I guess I wasn't. This award was just handed to me in a rainy Target parking lot this morning. After Andrew's speech therapy session, I decided that we needed to make a mad dash to Target for some winter boots. Now, before you start to snicker, let me explain. We live in the suburbs of Chicago. The windy city. The place where you typically see your first snow flakes around Thanksgiving. Well, we saw flakes on Saturday, mixed with the rain. Yes, it was cold enough Saturday morning to snow. But in the Sunday paper ads, there was a Target paper with a sale on winter boots. If you don't snatch a pair in October, good luck finding a pair when you really need them in December. Because around here, the spring line of clothes hit the racks around mid-February. Anyway, after a quick dash into Target for the boots, we were walking back to the car and as I was putting him into his seat a woman came up to me and said: "You get the Mother of the Year Award!". Why? Because I bought boots in time? Well, she proceeded to tell me that she watched me and Andrew walk through the parking lot. (Yep, the "you-are-freaking-me-out" radar kicked in at that moment!) Andrew held my hand. Andrew was watching for cars. Andrew was listening. *Disclaimer: this is a first for Andrew. Maybe he should be getting an award and not me! Then she thanked me for not letting my child dart into the parking lot and run amok like most mothers in this neighborhood do. Trust me, they do! They are so dog-gone busy on their cell phones or putting on their lipstick that they have no clue that their precious little child almost became my speed-bump! Ooops! I got off the subject again! Little did that woman see what an "angel" Andrew was in the store. Trying to jump out of the cart. Throwing the priceless boots out of the cart. Playing with the automated conveyor belt when we checked out. Pushing buttons on the credit card swipey thing. And then, for the next five minutes, play with the automated entrance doors of the store. Yep, my son is destined to be a door man. As long as the only work involved is for him to place his foot on the sensor that opens the doors, he's got the job! I am sure she would have thought twice about giving me that award had she witnessed all of that! But what she doesn't know won't hurt her. Oh yes, I have a speech to give! (Some portions of this speech are being taken from another speech that I read, just because I thought it was hilarious and well-spoken!)
"On behalf of my children, I would like to thank the nice lady in the Target parking lot for this award. Thank you for acknowledging that SOME people actually watch their children. Thank you for brightening my day since Chicago has since turned into Seattle for the month of October. (Cue music here) Thank you for allowing me to buckle my child into his seat quickly so I could make a quick exit. (Uh-oh! Gotta really wrap this up....here comes Kanye West!) Thank you very much!"