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Asher. A Play in 3 Acts.

Posted Jul 06 2010 9:18pm
Act 1
Monday morning. it's early. I am not at my best or most compassionate, being half-asleep and not thrilled with being awakened by a tattling preschooler. hey, at least i'm honest here. 
Asher {runs to me, throws arms around me, weeping}: Mommy, blivey punched me on de head!
me: what were you doing when she did that?
Asher: nothing. she punched me.
me: are you sure? what were you doing right before she punched you?
Asher: i was hitting her. but den she punched me!!!
me: sorry, dude. you shouldn't have hit her. go say sorry and don't hit her again, do you hear me?


Act 2
Monday afternoon. i am in bed, trying to cuddle bram to sleep (and get some rest, myself).
Asher {running into room, burying head in hands on my bed}: Mommy, i need you! blivey punched me on de back. {weeps bitterly}
me: oh, no, sweetie, are you ok?
Asher: yeah, i ok. but i not like blivey anymore. i just like brammy. not blivey. she punched me.
me {calling pleasantly so as not to get blithe's defences up}: blithe, can you come here, please? just for a minute, hun.
Blithe {enters}: yes, mommy?
me: did you punch asher?
Blithe: yes. but he was throwing rocks at me. i told him to stop but he didn't, so i tried to stop him.
me: asher, were you throwing rocks?
Asher: yes. but blivey punched me!!
me: ok, first off, blithe, there is no punching. that is not the way to handle disagreements, so that's not ok. and asher, there is no throwing rocks in the house. ever. do i need to take the rock collection away?
Asher {sniffling}: no. but blivey punched me. i not like blive anymore.
me: alright, blithe, can you apologize to asher for punching him?
Blithe: asher, i'm sorry for punching you.
Asher: i forgive you.
Blithe: huggies? {they hug. Asher begins to walk away.}
me: Asher, you need to say sorry to Blithe now.
Asher: Blivey, i sorry for throwing rocks at you.
Blithe: i forgive you. {Asher begins to walk away.}
me: Asher, you need to give huggies now. you have to fix your relationship. {they hug, though Asher is standing as far from Blithe as he possibly can.}


Act 3
Tuesday morning. 7 am. nuff said. Asher is crying and climbing up the stairs. he enters my room, weeping like the world is coming to an end and fire and brimstone have destroyed his favourite stuffy. he buries his head on his arms on my bed.
Asher {between sobs}: mommy, dare no cheese!! i want cheese, and dare no cheese!!


**author's note: i'd like to point out that discipline is usually a little more involved than just apologies. but i haven't slept well in a couple weeks, i'm exhausted, and frankly, in this heat, close physical contact with another person (eg, a hug) is punishment enough. also, yes. the boys have a rock collection. all grey gravel-type rocks. what of it? haha
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