Her Royal Highness has the flu. I may have the world's first fatal cold. I'm always obsessed with jammies, but today they hurt my skin. In case anyone else out there has a bad cold and has a pug recuperating from bladder surgery, here is my guide to surviving it. It's still a work in progress. 1. Carpet kitchen in wee wee pads filched from kindly neighbors with incontinent cats. 2. Filch more when Girl pug shows extreme distaste over using one more than once. 3. When neighbors start hiding from you, go buy human wee wee pads at drugstore. Pick up extra kleenex and Robitussin. 4. Take many naps, but without earplugs, so you can hear Girl pug sneaking off to try and wee on the carpet. 5. Take many hot showers, with door open so you can see Girl pug sneaking off to wee on the carpet. 6. Give Girl pug antibiotics every 12 hours in canned food. Give Boy pug canned food so he doesn't get mad and wee on the carpet. Swig directly from Robitussin bottle every four hours. 7. Blow nose, cough, repeat 8. Thank god for stuffy nose, which means you can't smell wee on carpet.