Will I be ok? Of course. Uber Shrink is quite concerned the malaria medication will indeed give me psychosis. Apparently it will also not protect me against malaria as much as it should, as some sites said it should be taken for several weeks before the trip, not just one. So I am told I may get malaria, while other studies he's read also tell him about my risk for a major depressive disorder due to the medicine that may not even be protecting me. So when I have a panic attack today, he seems a bit surprised, then while comforting me tells me he hopes the medicine I took the other day doesn't make my anxiety worse. And why, pray tell, am I anxious? Because you, Uber Shrink, are making my poor remodeled brain think too much. And I had yet to get my mosquito netting, to protect me further against the malaria I will get while psychotic, and the pure DEET spray to protect me, that will give me children with gills in the future, and while I am picking up the mosquito netting you find the military strength insecticide you want me to soak my clothes in, which says I cannot under any circumstances wear the treated clothes against my bare skin, and then you look perplexed when I pick up the all natural bug spray and jet off down the Swiss Army Knife aisle muttering to myself. And while we have contemplated, a bit toooo closely, having children in the future, your fears of me getting knocked up before I'm ready or you're ready coupled with the news I may become psychotic even after stopping the meds and can't get pregnant for many months after plus you're stress and anxiety about life coupled with my visions of finned children are really really really screwing with my libido and self esteem.
Which is why you are asleep in my bed, and I am out in my living room writing blog posts.
I am leaving, in less than a week, to measure myself against my new standards, and against my new future. I am seeking out safety by leaving safety, because if I ever want to get on with the business of living, I have to see how hard I can live.
Less than a week.
Will I be ok? Of course. Uber Shrink is quite concerned the malaria medication will indeed give me psychosis. Apparently it will also not protect me against malaria as much as it should, as some sites said it should be taken for several weeks before the trip, not just one. So I am told I may get malaria, while other studies he's read also tell him about my risk for a major depressive disorder due to the medicine that may not even be protecting me. So when I have a panic attack today, he seems a bit surprised, then while comforting me tells me he hopes the medicine I took the other day doesn't make my anxiety worse. And why, pray tell, am I anxious? Because you, Uber Shrink, are making my poor remodeled brain think too much. And I had yet to get my mosquito netting, to protect me further against the malaria I will get while psychotic, and the pure DEET spray to protect me, that will give me children with gills in the future, and while I am picking up the mosquito netting you find the military strength insecticide you want me to soak my clothes in, which says I cannot under any circumstances wear the treated clothes against my bare skin, and then you look perplexed when I pick up the all natural bug spray and jet off down the Swiss Army Knife aisle muttering to myself. And while we have contemplated, a bit toooo closely, having children in the future, your fears of me getting knocked up before I'm ready or you're ready coupled with the news I may become psychotic even after stopping the meds and can't get pregnant for many months after plus you're stress and anxiety about life coupled with my visions of finned children are really really really screwing with my libido and self esteem.
Which is why you are asleep in my bed, and I am out in my living room writing blog posts.
I am leaving, in less than a week, to measure myself against my new standards, and against my new future. I am seeking out safety by leaving safety, because if I ever want to get on with the business of living, I have to see how hard I can live.