I disappeared for a while there and have to say how sorry I am. I've been jumping out of my skin, wondering how to get back to my normal self, wishing my feeling of helplessness would end. You never realize in life how precious people are to you until the threat of losing them forever is thrown at you. I spent the last week realizing how much I cared about someone, hesitating to tell that someone, and then suddenly they were gone. Gone, disappeared, lost, I wasn't sure. I spent a night chasing small leads, listening to lies until I discovered the truth. I thought they were gone forever. And I would have never had the chance to tell them how I felt. This thought haunted me until I saw them for the first time since their disappearance. I wanted to shake him, slap him, hug him, and kiss him all at the same time. My heart exploded with rage and hurt, humiliation and fear, and the more my words came out of my mouth, the more I wept. The shock of what happened is still with me, I still don't understand why it did. Why it had to. What choice was made to bring this event about? Would it have made a difference if I had said how I felt before it happened? Maybe I will never know for sure. All I know is my life will never be the same again.
You never realize in life how precious people are to you until the threat of losing them forever is thrown at you. I spent the last week realizing how much I cared about someone, hesitating to tell that someone, and then suddenly they were gone. Gone, disappeared, lost, I wasn't sure. I spent a night chasing small leads, listening to lies until I discovered the truth. I thought they were gone forever. And I would have never had the chance to tell them how I felt. This thought haunted me until I saw them for the first time since their disappearance.
I wanted to shake him, slap him, hug him, and kiss him all at the same time. My heart exploded with rage and hurt, humiliation and fear, and the more my words came out of my mouth, the more I wept. The shock of what happened is still with me, I still don't understand why it did. Why it had to. What choice was made to bring this event about? Would it have made a difference if I had said how I felt before it happened? Maybe I will never know for sure.
All I know is my life will never be the same again.