Tips on coping with Dementia during the Christmas Season
Posted Dec 09 2011 12:55pm
Tips on coping with Dementia during the Christmas Season
There is no getting away from the fact that Christmas can be a daunting and frustrating experience when taking care of a loved one with Alzheimer’s or any other related dementia. The festive season is supposed to festive and joyful and it is sad that we should feel anxious and stressed at this time. There are some small but important steps you can take to make the season a little easier on yourself as the care giver as well as on the person with Alzheimer’s.
I cannot stress enough the importance of empathy. Empathy means taking a moment to sit quietly and imagine what is like to be in the other person’s shoes. If you do not fully understand this disease then a support group or a few information sessions which are often held by the Alzheimer’s association will be invaluable to you. It is critical to truly appreciate how your loved one is feeling in order to be able to cope with the many complex and varied issues that arise.
At Christmas, we often have large groups of family over, providing us with the opportunity to connect and catch up on the year’s events. For the person with Alzheimer’s, it is important that their routine is not disrupted too much and yet we still want them to feel a part of the festivities. Having too many people around and a lot of noise may unsettle and upset the person with Alzheimer’s. One solution is to arrange in advance to have a quiet room where guests can come and go in small batches to greet and chat with your loved one. When things become overwhelming, you can simply ask your guests to leave him or her alone for a while. Be aware that too much loud noise is also upsetting in some cases and so try to restrict the chatter and noise to one side of the house.
Although it is natural to become a bit bossy when trying to organize things, avoid giving out orders or arguing with your loved one who has a dementia. It will only make matters worse and increase your stress levels. Take the time – find the time – to be calm and gentle with him or her. Allow them to participate with appropriate tasks such as hanging decorations or icing a cake. Play music that they would have enjoyed in their time and encourage them to sing along. The emphasis is to make the environment calm, relaxing and most of all happy. When you are overwrought and stressed, your loved one will sense your emotions and become vulnerable themselves.
Perhaps it might help to remember what the priority is: to love and enjoy your family. Nothing else is important. Traditions can change and be adapted. The single most important goal is to get through Christmas calmly and to be able to sit back at the end of it all and have the sense of satisfaction that you and your loved one not only survived the festivities but actually enjoyed them as well.
There is no getting away from the fact that Christmas can be a daunting and frustrating experience when taking care of a loved one with Alzheimer’s or any other related dementia. The festive season is supposed to festive and joyful and it is sad that we should feel anxious and stressed at this time. There are some small but important steps you can take to make the season a little easier on yourself as the care giver as well as on the person with Alzheimer’s.
I cannot stress enough the importance of empathy. Empathy means taking a moment to sit quietly and imagine what is like to be in the other person’s shoes. If you do not fully understand this disease then a support group or a few information sessions which are often held by the Alzheimer’s association will be invaluable to you. It is critical to truly appreciate how your loved one is feeling in order to be able to cope with the many complex and varied issues that arise.
At Christmas, we often have large groups of family over, providing us with the opportunity to connect and catch up on the year’s events. For the person with Alzheimer’s, it is important that their routine is not disrupted too much and yet we still want them to feel a part of the festivities. Having too many people around and a lot of noise may unsettle and upset the person with Alzheimer’s. One solution is to arrange in advance to have a quiet room where guests can come and go in small batches to greet and chat with your loved one. When things become overwhelming, you can simply ask your guests to leave him or her alone for a while. Be aware that too much loud noise is also upsetting in some cases and so try to restrict the chatter and noise to one side of the house.
Although it is natural to become a bit bossy when trying to organize things, avoid giving out orders or arguing with your loved one who has a dementia. It will only make matters worse and increase your stress levels. Take the time – find the time – to be calm and gentle with him or her. Allow them to participate with appropriate tasks such as hanging decorations or icing a cake. Play music that they would have enjoyed in their time and encourage them to sing along. The emphasis is to make the environment calm, relaxing and most of all happy. When you are overwrought and stressed, your loved one will sense your emotions and become vulnerable themselves.
Perhaps it might help to remember what the priority is: to love and enjoy your family. Nothing else is important. Traditions can change and be adapted. The single most important goal is to get through Christmas calmly and to be able to sit back at the end of it all and have the sense of satisfaction that you and your loved one not only survived the festivities but actually enjoyed them as well.
Article by: Rosemary Charlton