Hanging Out With Dad, What Men Really Want For Father’s Day
Posted May 28 2009 11:36pm
Sometimes we make holidays too hard. We buy cards. We buy ties, baseball caps and t-shirts for our dads. We plan elaborate parties and rack our brains for the next great Father’s Day gift when what our guys really want is just to hang out with us.
Does your dad like breakfast? Mine does. Why not have a pancake extravaganza? Pick up 3 or 4 different kinds of syrups, maybe some bananas or walnuts and cook breakfast together–or at least pull a chair up for dad so he can sip on his coffee and read the paper nearby.
Is your dad a fisherman? Pick up some worms or some shrimp and find a lake or stream and hang out a bit. Even if dad is in a care home, you can usually take him on an outing for a couple of hours–or get that fishy kids game that have magnets on the end of tiny fishing poles–it’s fun.
Stop by the library and rent some WWII movies–you know, those classic war films with Lee Marvin. Make bowls of ice cream (don’t forget the whip cream!) and even if you’re not into shoot-em-ups, you can be for a couple of hours.
Make your own card by writing your favorite “dad” story. Start with, “My favorite day with dad was….” Or, how about “I’ll never forget when dad…” Write it big and clear so he can keep it and reread it.
Does your dad have a friend he hasn’t seen in a long time? A work buddy? A distant cousin? Why not plan a get together. Even if you have to pick the buddy up and take him to your dad’s place–or plan for them to meet at a restaurant, it will be toally worth it just to see the two of them gabbing and smiling This hanging out time with a buddy might be just the thing to lift his spirits.
No matter how you celebrate Father’s Day, remember to relax and not watch the clock. It’s so easy (espeically if you’re his caregiver) to get on such a regimine that we forget just to sit and talk, to not be in a hurry, to not think about all the things we have to do. Even if your dad has dementia, Lewy Body or Alzheimer’s, research has shown that the things we’ve enjoyed all our life (art, music, entertainment) still holds true–even after our mental decline.
In other words, your dad is still your dad, and our most precious gift to offer…is our time.