I’m not really sure why, but for some reason, the birth of Christ & the meaning of Christmas on a VERY deep level, has resonated in my heart this year. I tried to justify it in Keely’s circumstance, but found no real connection… except for the fact that mostly due to Keely, my relationship with the Lord is different. Not just deeper, but different! In leaning on Him & understanding what it feels like to watch a suffering child, I’ve started to comprehend the intensity of the sacrifice that God made for US. Since becoming a Christian, the birth of Christ was obviously significant & touching, but this year, it’s just been different for me. It’s like for the first time, I really get it… in my heart. A start, to understanding God’s love through what He did, to a point of falling to my knees & weeping. Like many Christians, I pray often for God to show me how to love Him the way He loves. I know that I’ll never fully comprehend that love until I’m no longer a part of this world, but I pray that my heart, as it is cleansed daily, is able to move into a more Christ-like love. I’ve realized that is something that transpires in my spirit. I keep waiting for the human ”feeling”, but it’s not the same. I realized that just recently while meditating on the entire Christmas story… every person involved, every sacrifice, etc. Everytime I think about it, I almost fall to my knees in worship & LOVE. It’s in my spirit… that reverence… that complete awe.
Last year, Pastor Steve did a series called, “Finding Yourself In The Christmas Story”. It was one of my favorite series. Each week, he brought to light each individual that played a part in Christ coming into the world & not only the sacrifice, but the LOVE & trust they had for God in order to make the story come to pass the way God planned. Each one of their sacrifices, love, dedication, & trust changed OUR eternity. If just one of them had decided not to believe what the angel of the Lord told them, if just one decided to bail, if just one decided to go their own way instead of God’s, our very salvation would likely be jeopardized. Joseph’s fiance turned up pregnant in a time when that was unheard of, & definite grounds for Joseph to call off any betrothment to her with full support… but he claimed the child as his own, knowing that he hadn’t slept with Mary before marriage, & ruining his name & reputation for something he didn’t even do. & I wonder, was Mary REALLY fully connected with the fact that she was carrying the child that would save the world? & God the father, think of His ultimate sacrifice. He is the alpha & omega… He sent His son into the world, knowing every detail of his life AND his horrible crucifixion. He knew His only child would suffer immensely… but He loved us & wanted to rescue us THAT much!
It’s the story, looked at as a whole… from the view point of each person. It really is nothing short of the ULTIMATE love. It shows me that I will never fully understand God’s love until I no longer am bound to the simplicity of a human. Only the spirit, free from the chains of human form, can understand. It’s THAT complex. But this year, I know that my love for Christ grew dramatically deeper, because I can’t even listen to the lyrics of a Christmas song, or think of that night in Bethlehem & everything that lead up to it, without feeling something more profound in my spirit than I’ve ever experienced!
I pray that as our children grow older & start to gain some understanding of such things, that they understand the sacrifice & love that God has for us & the full significance of what happened that Christmas Eve over 2,000 years ago.