I wrote yesterday about my oasis. Today I went there for the day. It was mostly successful. In my mind I stayed clear of C. I wrote holiday cards and letters and then went out shopping for a couple of hours. It was fun to be out on my own, but I ended up entirely exhausted. I avoided thinking about why I was exhausted and just let it all pass through the sieve of my thought process. I did not hold onto a thought of C or spend time hating it because of the limitations it imposes on me.
I just let it all go. I stayed in the moment of enjoying the lights, the decorations, the friendly people, the fun of shopping and the joy of having Buster with me–instead of the dreaded walker. Although the C word arose a few times in conversation while others mentioned friends or family members who had or have it–it’s striking how many people know others who are close to them with C–I let it all pass freely through my mind. I did not hold it or keep it or spend any energy reacting to it.
What I ended up with was a nicely tiring day of preparing for the holidays. It felt good. It reminded me of how much I love this time of year and the reason I love it: my mom.
All in all, it was a nice time at the oasis. I will return again soon.