I have excellent news to report -- I finally managed to crack the barrier that's been holding me back from learning new skills I cannot survive without. I don't want to get into all the technical details, because first, folks who are not nerds won't get as much of a charge out of it as I do, and second, if I go into the details, the hard-core nerds out there will probably turn up their noses in disdain at me.
Bottom line is, after years (literally) of telling myself I need to learn this certain skill - and I truly do, in order to stay employed in the world of software engineering - yesterday I was finally able to just sit down and work my way through a first pass at learning and experimenting with this essential new skill and brand of technical know-how.
I'm elated. Ecstatic. Part of me is totally bummed that it's taken me this long. For at least three years, I've been telling myself I need to master this stuff. In fact, if I'd started three years ago, I'd be in a much better position, financially and professionally. But I couldn't do it. I wanted to, but I just couldn't. My brain was newly broken (in 2004) in ways I didn't understand, and my thinking process had altered in ways I didn't realize.
Heck, I didn't even realize that my thinking process was altered... My brain was sufficiently fogged, and I was sufficiently numbed by my constant struggle to just get by, so that any inkling that I may have had about my brain not being fully functional just got lost in the shuffle. And I lost a lot of valuable time, thinking that my brain was working just fine, when it was anything but.
That's spilt milk, tho'. What I need to focus on, is what I have going for me, what new strategies I've been able to apply from my neuropsychological examination, and what I learned over the past few days about my learning process.
What I have going for me:
What new strategies I've been able to apply from my neuropsychological examination:
What I learned over the past few days about my learning process:
So, this is very exciting for me. I've accomplished a goal I set for myself back in 2005, and I'm about 200% better-off, employability-wise, than I was just a week ago. I still have a long ways to go before I can say I'm an expert in this stuff, but the fact that I've actually started down this road and I've got a working app that employs multiple technologies that I have recently learned, makes a huge difference not only to my resume and my career prospects, but to my self-regard, as well.