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Well, wring me out and hang me up to dry...

Posted Apr 11 2009 1:03am

I'm still a little frantic. After my rotten weekend, last night I slept for 14 hours, and semi-intentionally missed a "luncheon" at my other (full time) job--I didn't want to go at all, and had told my boss I might not make it, but I know it would have been better for me professional-wise if I would've went. I just couldn't get out of bed, and I couldn't make a decision as to whether I should go or not, or call or not, so I just went back to sleep. That's really bad. I'm kind of shocked that I did that. My schedule is pretty flexible, so I don't think anyone probably thought too much of it, but still....

I went to work today just dreading it (at my full-time job, not the one that I did over the weekend), and I was absolutely sure that I was going to be in trouble for something, or I was going to run into a problem that I couldn't handle. I was still really stressed out and reeling from the weekend. But I got here, and was so relieved to be doing my work that I just blasted through a bunch of it and finished one of my projects. That made me feel a lot better about work. For today, LOL.

Tomorrow, DD has therapy at 2pm, then at 3pm I have a "staff meeting" at the weekend job, then I have to go to work at my full time job. On Thursday, I have a staff meeting at a different location for my part time job, and it's at a restaurant--they're taking us out to lunch, because two people are leaving and it's kind of a "farewell" party. THEN I'm going to work. I could probably skip the restaurant thing, but these people are my coworkers, and I kind of feel like I should go....we'll see how I do on Thursday!

After all that, I do have Friday completely off and to myself, so I'm looking forward to that. I want to get one of the dogs groomed and spend some time in the yard.

I had a dream that I woke up and Jim was sleeping on our couch again....more like a nightmare, LOL!!!

DH has been somewhat up-and-down during all of this. On one hand, he's made some observations regarding himself and his behavior that have greatly impressed me (like--"if I want a job, I have to swallow my pride and get out there and take the first thing that someone offers me"...but on the other hand, he still hasn't contacted his therapist or anyone else, for that matter. And he starts beating himself up with the "I don't have any money, how did things get so bad? I need a job, but nobody will hire me" etc...but he doesn't do anything to change it. I have bitten my tongue several times already this week when he's gone there. I'm hoping that maybe eventually he'll see the light--it seems like once in a while he does, and until then, I am going to keep on trying to keep my expectations low.

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