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Undies

Posted Sep 14 2012 12:00am
Hello, my name is Robin and I'm an underwear addict.

I was raised in a house where I felt like I wasn't allowed to be pretty. For some reason that was for other girls. Taller girls with thin waists and no potbellies, girls with slim legs and big eyes, girls with no glasses and ladylike hands. My mom always bought basic, plain, cotton underwear and functional beige bras for me and usually without asking my opinion of what I wanted. Bra shopping with my mom was a nightmare as I looked longingly at all the sexy black bras and lacy bras. No way I would ask for them though, the ridicule would have been too much to handle. Instead I settled on whatever my mom pointed out for me. 

When I finally got a job I had enough money to start buying some nice underwear. Thongs, teddies, bodysuits, and bras all without consulting my mom. I was the one who did the laundry so I didn't even have to worry about my mom coming across any of it and making fun of me. I could also feel pretty in a very private way. Nobody could see my underwear and make fun of me for looking stupid or ugly or wearing mismatched undies or unflattering colours. It was liberating :)

It also became my way of expressing myself in my dysfunctional marriage. Ex made fun of me when I changed something outward about myself (usually with a snort and the comment "you're wearing that?") so underwear was my way to rebel against him and feel good about myself at the same time. After the marriage ended I bought more and more bras (ooooooh eBay you temptress...) as my way of treating myself to something nice even though I couldn't really afford it. It just developed into a habit to go to Winners or The Bay and ooh and aah over pretty underthings. I continued to buy them, many of them for when I lost some weight instead of for right now.

Now that the house has been painted S and I bought some new bedroom furniture and it involved smaller drawers for underwear. I took this as an opportunity to cull the mass of lacy bits I'd accumulated over the years. I started with the bras.

There were 48. Yes, forty-eight bras. I tried on each and every one of them and managed to get rid of half of them. I kept two for sentimental reasons, five for if/when I gain about 5 pounds, and seventeen for any day use. It still seems like a lot of bras...but really I do lose and gain weight in my boobies with my menstrual cycle (without the period, still have the egg cycles though). 

Then came the panties. I counted those as well and had 244 pairs. Yep, no typo there. I threw out 59 pairs immediately knowing they didn't fit or had burst elastic or were known to be uncomfortable. Then I took the time to try on the remainder. It took a long time and I ended up with 89 pairs for keeping. That's 42 for if/when I gain 5 pounds and 47 that I can put on right now. There was no point in keeping the smaller sizes, the weight isn't really leaving me and I end up feeling fat when I see clothes that don't fit.

And now I have a semi-reasonable amount of underwear. Ok, kind of on the outside edge of reasonable. But they are so pretty that even if I don't wear them all the time they are nice to look at sometimes. Now, I wonder what Winners has that's new....
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