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Two Thousand One Hundred Ninety One Days

Posted Aug 15 2009 8:53pm
It's my 6th ReBirthday today. Had I been successful in my suicide attempt six years ago, you and I never would have met. Hmmm. It's rather sobering to think of all the ripples my psychotic postpartum depression's desperation would have wrought. Rather depressing, too. Let's not go there.

Instead of what might have been, 'tis better to remember that yesterday's fork in the road led to today's scenic route.

I marveled as Mario pedaled furiously through rays of today's afternoon sunshine while mastering the skills demanded of his big boy bike and later shook my head in frustration that we are still potty-training him. Oy vey.

Bowser and I spent the day doing mundane things like figuring out the monthly budget, holding hands, and ordering pizza. Tonight I'm going to see if he can manage to stay awake through an entire movie. Wait, two seconds ago he said, "I'm tired." Not looking too good. That's ok. He snores cute. He does everything cute.

Luigi and I read another chapter of Wind in the Willows after our evening cuddle. During said cuddle, Luigi announced, "I have to fart, but I'm not going to." And then he did, farted that is. Typical, run-of-the-mill stinky 8 1/2 year old boy fart. Our cuddle ended abruptly as I brought my nose to safer air currents, but I won the tickle war that ensued thereafter.

I had a list of things I meant to do and didn't - grocery store, post office, laundry - but I did get to chat with several girlfriends today - shared gossip, worries, memories, plans, and "I love you"s. The store will be there tomorrow and the post office will have to wait until Monday. Back in the day, Cloe, Kate, Genevieve, and I always said, "boys will come and go, but girlfriends are forever", then they'd throw in an amendment if I had a girlfriend girlfriend at the time so we were all clear about priorities. Nowadays, it's "errands come and go, but girlfriends are forever." Forever is just about the right amount of time.

Other things happened today, too. Lots of things. Some good, some frustrating, some sad, some unnerving, some deliciously silly. It was a day full of all sorts of moments and no matter what those moments contained, I'm still glad I was here for them.

It was a day, my day, a family day, a friendship day, and I, Sophie, was present.

Happy Rebirthday.




P.S. My friend Marta, from Writing in the Water , sent me a link as an early Rebirthday present. I invite you to go check it out for yourself , look carefully and read it all the way through; the world is a better place because of women like this and women like Marta. Thank you, Marta. For everything.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
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