To Hell With Titrations. Let’s Get the Party Started!!!
Posted Jul 27 2013 12:00am
I got a call from my pharmacy today saying they had some medication to deliver to me. Huh? Then they asked if it wasn’t me who called them yesterday? Uh…no. Then they said, “Nobody called you?”
All of my med refills were done a short while back. I fumbled around about some discussion between my doctors making changes and and this and that. I was too terrified to ask what the hell the girl was talking about. Indeed, there has been a lot of discussion but…
…I was still awaiting “the final outcome.” Well, let me tell you. If Dr. PA didn’t get what she wanted? It would NOT have been the FINAL outcome at all. *looks at you all with menacing frown*
I got a migraine last night or was it the night before or who cares. That tells you where my head is (or isn’t.) The girl brought over a sheet with all the “changes.” My worst fear was that whoever was doing this would lower my Biphentin. NO GODDAMN WAY. It’s the only thing that gives me an ounce of concentration when I’m sick–if I’m lucky.
What I wanted was to have my ACs (Topamax and Lamictal) increased. This was necessitated because I was shooting through the stratosphere or even further (I had no clue at times) with Manic episodes. And we’re talking Bipolar I. I’m Bipolar II. I only get hypomanic and really, depression and more of the icky anxiety and low stuff were my problems.
I also had a thought about my moods and how they change since losing the Clobazam two years ago for the Typical Absence Status Epilepticus. Indescribably brutal. However, there are two states that were utterly horrific and so foreign to me, it made me look as if I didn’t have Bipolar at all! But they made me happy. Wot?
“Utterly horrific.” “So foreign to me.” “Made me look as if I didn’t have Bipolar at all!” “But they made me happy.”
SHIT. I could have been cycling non-stop from the beginning! For two full years now–and those two states were BP I Manic Episodes! Look at the list! It’s just now everythingis coming to the fore.
One good thing about Topamax and Lamictal is they are two of few that can help with Typical Absence Status Epilepticus. Oh, wouldn’t it be ridiculously amazing if this ridiculous (not-at-all-a-titration) increase helped with that?
I had to keep staring at my current bottles and my “new” ones. I couldn’t believe my eyes. Then when I focussed a bit better, I started laughing like crazy. I think I probably sounded like a seagull choking on my new doses and all pills I’ll now have to take.
I seriously cannot believe Non-Arsey Neuro went that bloody high! And no titration. But I think I this happened. I called up Sweetie GP and freaked out. She must have seriously kicked someone’s ass. It’s also so insane as I wasn’t even consulted! He just faxed the new scripts to pharmacy! This whole thing keeps getting better and better, you know?
I’m gonna be pretty messed up for a few days *laughing so hard* Oh, yeah!!! I’m so hyper-assed crazy right now!!!!!!!! I was feeling sick because I have my period, the migraine was catamenial (so I’m in Typical Absence Status Land right now.) Just GETTING the new meds has now turned me into a Bipolar Rocket again, shooting through the sky! That’s why I need the pills! Presumably they’ll help with the lows as well.
I have to see my Therapist on Monday too. That will be “interesting.” I’ll also start tomorrow and not tonight. An even and full day to begin going completely off the wall.
I’ll be okay. I’ve been on these meds for years. I’ll get a good brain bashin’. Probably like it’s in the ring as a featherweight vs. the biggest guy in heavyweight, undefeated for 10 seasons. Never a problem with SJS either but I know what to look for if something’s not right.
I actually have done a doubling/no titration of my Topamax before. *winks*