Frustration is the name of the game. I want to go spin class in a big way but the sensible part of me is saying "no, wait until you're 100% before you start that back, remember what happened on Monday". Whilst the other part of me is saying "no no you go, just take it easy you'll be fine, you don't have to go as fast or put the tension as high as long as you go"
Now on the third hand my body is saying "I really don't feel all that hot, there is this not quite a pain but yet not quite not a pain in my side and I really do think I'm feeling something in there". So many hands, one poor brain and a battered body. Really I am a mess.
GP who was called after my little 'episode' on Friday. Thinks I should see a surgeon. Onco OBGYN who I saw on Monday thinks I should be fine and "oh by the way you're putting on weight if you really want to be off of the metformin you have to exercise 5 times a week". Then there's me and I'm now doubting myself as to whether what I'm feeling is real or psychosomatic. Thinking back to the last few months before I even considered that there was something amiss in my body I know there were times when exercising that I would be feeling something strange in exactly the same spot that I'm feeling it in now. There would even be times when I'm lying down and my left side would be uncomfortable. There were other signs which now when putting everything together is saying "no fool its not psychosomatic something is really going on in there" *sigh*
So what to do? Go back by Dr. #2 and say check me again. Go with my personal favourite and just ignore till it gets worse or seek out a third opinion?
In the meantime all I really want to do is get on a bike , listen to the music and follow the routine that the instructors give us to do. I want to feel that burn in my thighs and know that ultimately that means I'm getting some bad ass legs that forgetting everyone else I would drool over and can't keep my hands off of.