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The Darkness Can Consume You.

Posted Jan 09 2011 8:24pm

I've been living inside of my mind for the last two weeks with the threat of slipping back  into my old ways.  I feel as though I am where I was three two years ago.  Alone.  I was also in my own misery drowning it with a bottle of wine.  I didn't want to feel the pain or loneliness that was consuming my mine and body.  At this moment I am drinking a glass of wine and please just because I am doesn't mean any body should. I am sick.  And the sickness stems from many years of abuse, loneliness, abandonment the undiagnosed mental illness Bipolar.

I feel this way because I'm feel that my son is abandoning me. I moved to North Carolina just to be near  him and since I've been here I have hardly seen him.  I realize he works so I understand that. I guess I was just asking for too much.  Soon I'll be moving in a new place where I hope to have new friends and things to do.

I you or I are not careful darkness can take at our moment of weakness.  We must be strong.  I must b e strong to know that I can live without anyone holding my hand. I've done it before and I can do it again.
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