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So, Is This What Medical School Feels Like?

Posted Jan 18 2010 12:00am

Dr. Fucking PA, indeed! I think it’s time I switched careers and became a Funeral Director! At least then I could handle things all in one go! Quite simple! Just toss my sorry, sad sack, ass right into the incinerator and that would be it!

I don’t know if I want to rip out my hair, cry or both! Probably the latter, even more, and then incinerate myself!

Today was my first day of school, but last “night” might have been it, in reality.  Not knowing what the hell I was walking into, I ran through the chapter in the textbook they would be covering.  Oh.My.God.  Where do I begin? *crosses eyes*

How does being at it for at least five hours minimum, sound? Maybe six hours? I finally started to get ready for bed around midnight.

I am late to the class.  It has already been “clipping along,” however, I didn’t realize just how much.  They have their final exam IN A MONTH!!! I want all of you to imagine what my face looks like right now.  I took a Valium/Diazepam on the way home today after we were done.  I didn’t even know how I felt at the time.  Nonetheless, I thought it a good “pre-emptive strike,” as I sure didn’t have a clue how I’d feel in the next five minutes!

The course is comprised of mostly terminology, and not so much Anatomy and Physiology.  This came as quite a surprise.  In fact, it’s much more than mostly terminology.  And some of these terms?! I mean, now it’s time for me to eat an entire bakery of Humble Pies! Dr. PA is pretty good but…

Not to mention, this is lots of fun for her loss of ability to spell and retain verbal information, due to her loooovvvveeeellllyyy Anticonvulsants.  It’s not that I don’t love you, my pretties; you keep my bean in fairly stable shape.  In a lot of ways.  For all the goddamn things that are wrong with me!!! Still, you’ve made me stoopid and loopy in my bean (despite all the goddamn things that are wrong with me!!!)

This is also a real gas for my Dysgraphia!!! Oh, Bloody Hell to the nth degree! Attending school is bad enough, but when you’re dealing with some words that are 15 characters in length? *bangs head on desk* Even if I do know the term, I can still screw it all “around the world” in 80 days minutes seconds no, days…because it TAKES me that long to fix it!!!

I took the Instructor aside during a break to ‘fess up about the Dysgraphia and the Asperger’s.  She said it was fine, everything would be taken slow.  Pfft.  Cold comfort, if you ask me.  I’m not complaining, though.  Both she, and all of the other students, are great and very helpful.

At least I got my assignment done, and only one wrong mark.  However, more lovely testing on the above chapter, tomorrow.  That means I need to do some more review tonight.  I was so overwhelmed by simply doing the work, plus figuring out how the class was run, trying to understand the course’s overall structure…

The Instructor is going to prepare me a little “package” for the previous eight chapters.  I do want all of the information–I need it! Between learning all of the material as we continue to move on, I also have to get that previous stuff sorted in a cohesive manner.  I need to bring all of the elements together.  None of it will make sense if I don’t.  I know how to do it; or how I want to do it.  We all learn differently, and I know “my style.”  I know what is effective for me.  It’s just going to take me so long!

Well, as a true “medical student,” I guess I’ll be working non-stop, all the hours I can, and then try to fit in what’s left for sleep and food! *rolls eyes* Then I’ll move on to my next course, or “rotation.”

Just to leave you with my favourite term from Chapter Nine, here you are.  Also, I’m not giving you a definition.  Think how well this one went over with my insane Dysgraphia!

coccidioidomycosis

Wait, let’s translate that into “PA Speak.”

  • Supercalifragalisticexpialadocious!
  • Corporate Idiots Do My Taxes
  • Occidental Diode On My Coat
  • Coincidences Are My Costs
  • Moldy Cods Are Gross
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