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Mixing it up

Posted Apr 19 2013 12:34pm
Louis-Léopold Boilly [Public domain], via Wikimedia Commons

Mixed episodes are the worst. Ask any person with bipolar disorder who experiences these horrendous times, and they'll probably say the same thing. One second you're flying, the next you've crashed. It's all jumbled together. I've been hanging on for dear life for at least two weeks, and I've had enough.

The triggers? Hmm...could it be I'm a bit stressed because I'm getting married in 50 days and I'm still getting unasked-for advice (no, Jackie, not you). Or perhaps it's that my younger daughter was in a car accident (grateful she only broke a finger), and I'm trying to find her a car for the same amount the insurance gave me. Oh wait, how about recovering from spinal fusion (PLIF --->) and feeling trapped in my brace, unable to do any of the things I love to do?
The symptoms...absolute confusion and worse-than-usual memory loss, severe depression, on the verge of tears, talking a mile-a-minute, giddy, happy, agitated over everything, bug-crawly skin (I wonder if that's in the DMSV), starving then no appetite. Meanwhile, the weather seems to be cruising right along with me, hot one day and cold/rainy the next.
What am I going to to about it? Just hang on, I suppose, like my mother and her mother before me always said "This too shall pass." I'll try meditation when I remember, but lately that's been flying out the window. I can't seem to get my brain quiet enough.
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