Earlier tonight (in this midst of my depression episode) I took 2mg Ativan and felt that "calm" shortly thereafter. At first I wasn't going to tak anymore pills period whatsoever. My "self-monitoring" stepped in and demanded I take at least some of them. I settled on the Lamictal (it's a tried and true druh I've been on for over a year), Prozac (10mg, combined with Lamictal had been the best combination yet so I will stick with it), and Lithium (simply bc Prozac and Lamictal alone weren't working anymore. Abilify and Revia... they can kiss my butt. No thank you. No more.
I do not have any answers to the questions on my previous post. I have no idea. I'm stuck on the philosophical concepts of the situation... which is always what happens when a depressive episode bites me in the bum.
I doodled on my foot/ankle (where I am adding vines around the already existing butterfly). It turned out well I think. Being artistic (drawing/oil painting/etc.) is the only thing I can do when I am symptomatic with either depression or mania.
The Ativan worked and I went to sleep. It was solid sleep and felt really good. I woke up just now (3:30am) thinking it was morning and well... it isn't. I tried to sleep but all I kept thinking about was some great solution I had... but couldn't quite remember what it was. I have this pressured feeling inside, as though there is something I must do. I must do I must do I must do. it would be a big help if I could put my finger on exactly what it was that I should be doing ;)
This afternoon I have a blood draw for my Li levls and thyroid measure. I have hypothyroid and I know Li can mess with that. It's silly though, the doctors aren't the ones that thougt of that grand idea... *I* did and I have to request it. So silly.
Well I am not sleepy now. I think I will take photos of the tattoo design I have drawn on my foot, and post them just for the heck of it. I need something to do and this seems like an artistic enough of an activity!!!!!! :D
Earlier tonight (in this midst of my depression episode) I took 2mg Ativan and felt that "calm" shortly thereafter. At first I wasn't going to tak anymore pills period whatsoever. My "self-monitoring" stepped in and demanded I take at least some of them. I settled on the Lamictal (it's a tried and true druh I've been on for over a year), Prozac (10mg, combined with Lamictal had been the best combination yet so I will stick with it), and Lithium (simply bc Prozac and Lamictal alone weren't working anymore. Abilify and Revia... they can kiss my butt. No thank you. No more.
I do not have any answers to the questions on my previous post. I have no idea. I'm stuck on the philosophical concepts of the situation... which is always what happens when a depressive episode bites me in the bum.
I doodled on my foot/ankle (where I am adding vines around the already existing butterfly). It turned out well I think. Being artistic (drawing/oil painting/etc.) is the only thing I can do when I am symptomatic with either depression or mania.
The Ativan worked and I went to sleep. It was solid sleep and felt really good. I woke up just now (3:30am) thinking it was morning and well... it isn't. I tried to sleep but all I kept thinking about was some great solution I had... but couldn't quite remember what it was. I have this pressured feeling inside, as though there is something I must do. I must do I must do I must do. it would be a big help if I could put my finger on exactly what it was that I should be doing ;)
This afternoon I have a blood draw for my Li levls and thyroid measure. I have hypothyroid and I know Li can mess with that. It's silly though, the doctors aren't the ones that thougt of that grand idea... *I* did and I have to request it. So silly.
Well I am not sleepy now. I think I will take photos of the tattoo design I have drawn on my foot, and post them just for the heck of it. I need something to do and this seems like an artistic enough of an activity!!!!!! :D