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I Said, “PAUSE, Asshole”

Posted Sep 28 2008 8:55pm

D might wanna fix the post. I just used “asshole” in the title.

But…

“PAUSE……

PAUSE!”

Dammit, where’s the “pause button” on life?  Call this my whiney post. Call this my “get a grip” post. Call it whatever you want. I couldn’t give a hot dump right now.

It’s not fair, Mom! Can you remember your kids saying that to you? “It’s not fair. Why can’t I go?” “It’s not fair. Why can’t you buy me that? Everyone has one!”

Well, ya know what? It’s not fair. Life…that is. Life is not fair. Life is stacked against us and may the strongest survive. And, that’s OK. I can deal with it most of the time. But, now and then, I need a damn pause. So, where’s the pause button? It’s not like I’m asking for a sent-down-from-Heaven do-over miracle. I’m not asking for the sky to open, harps playing, and a thunderous voice telling me that I can do everything over.   All, I’m asking for is a momentary pause. Time to catch my breath. Time to think…..really think.

Wouldn’t it be great to have that   pause button? Crisis…no problem. Hit pause and think it through. Hit play and deal with it.

Rapid thoughts…..hit pause.

Black hole depression…..hit pause.

Personal tragedy……why, hit pause.

Even, good times…..we could hit pause and savor them.

It’s part of being an adult, right? Right? I need some affirmation here. BUT, WHY does it have to be so damn hard with some of us? Are we in for bigger rewards in the afterlife for being stoic. Or,is that really the right word? Maybe, I should used “walked/pissed on”.

 I hate those unruffled, laid-back, it’s the karma/cosmos people! Well, actually, I don’t hate them. I envy them. How did they get that way? Is there some secret instruction manual? And, nobody better post a reply about yoga, spriutality, knowing yourself, loving yourself, or Mother Earth. So help me, if you do, I will hunt you down and strangle you with my bra-strap (or in the event that I’m not wearing a bra, I’ll use my shoelace). And, if one person post about that stupid book, “The Secret”, I will hunt you down and shove it up your ass.

Actually, my only idea about karma/cosmos comes from “My Name Is Earl”. I’d have that stupid lists of things I had done wrong and KARMA would tell me to right them all.

I’m being cranky and bitchy. But, I’m entitled to it. Better not be any post about PMS either or you will be very, very sorry.

So, somebody show me where that damn pause button is or at least that instruction manual. I few stiff drinks might help, also.

I could scream. I think I wil.

AAAAAAAARRRRRGGGGGHHHHHHHHH  ! Go to fullsize image     scream!

There is a theory which states that if ever anybody discovers exactly what the Universe is for and why it is here, it will instantly disappear and be replaced by something even more bizarre and inexplicable.
There is another theory which states that this has already happened.

In the beginning the Universe was created. This has made a lot of people very angry and been widely regarded as a bad move. “

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“What sane person could live in this world and not be crazy? “
Ursula K. LeGuin“Enlightenment comes when your third eye is at one with your turd eye and you can see your own shit.. “
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Filed under: Family, depression, failure, life, life problems, mental health, personal, rant

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