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I Plant the Landmines So Why Can’t I Find Them?

Posted Sep 25 2013 12:00am

Why do I go overboard with people? I’ve worked so hard to keep my impulsivity in check. Apparently not the case.

Somehow I still keep burying those landmines so shallow in the dirt. So shallow that anyone would trip over them.

Completely loaded with words and actions that are so obvious. Labels screaming: “SHUT THE FUCK UP! DON’T GO THERE! YOU ARE GOING TO KILL THIS PERSON!”

But as poor as my vision is in trying to “bury” my landmines, it cannot compare to how I somehow lose all of my vision in labelling them.

If I lose control with myself, I don’t care. Or perhaps I can deal with “me” in some bizarre and surrealistic way.

However, when I inflict my loss of control with “me” over someone else?

Rescue them. I will not be able to be resuscitated. In fact, it’s written up in my Directives ever since I decided to take the job of planting landmines.

DNR. 

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