After my previous few posts, it wouldn’t surprise any of my readers to see that I am looking for resources and input on how to take the edge off this season of too little sunlight and too much holiday stress and expectations. Thankfully, there is a good amount written about this topic, and generously shared on the web.
Make realistic expectations for the holiday season.
Set realistic goals for yourself.
Pace yourself. Do not take on more responsibilities than you can handle.
Make a list and prioritize the important activities. This can help make holiday tasks more manageable.
Be realistic about what you can and cannot do.
Do not put all your energy into just one day (for example, Thanksgiving Day, New Year’s Eve). The holiday cheer can be spread from one holiday event to the next.
Live “in the moment” and enjoy the present.
Look to the future with optimism.
Don’t set yourself up for disappointment and sadness by comparing today with the “good old days” of the past.
If you are lonely, try volunteering some of your time to help others.
Find holiday activities that are free, such as looking at holiday decorations, going window shopping without buying, and watching the winter weather, whether it’s a snowflake or a raindrop.
Limit your consumption of alcohol, since excessive drinking will only increase your feelings of depression.
Try something new. Celebrate the holidays in a new way.
Spend time with supportive and caring people.
Reach out and make new friends.
Make time to contact a long lost friend or relative and spread some holiday cheer.
Make time for yourself!
Let others share the responsibilities of holiday tasks.
Keep track of your holiday spending. Overspending can lead to depression when the bills arrive after the holidays are over. Extra bills with little budget to pay them can lead to further stress and depression.
Actually, with some practical tips, one can minimize the stress and depression that often accompany the holidays. You may even end up enjoying the holidays more than you thought you would.
Learn to recognize common holiday triggers, so you can disarm them before they lead to a meltdown:
Relationships. Relationships can cause turmoil, conflict or stress at any time, but tensions are often heightened during the holidays. Family misunderstandings and conflicts can intensify — especially if you’re thrust together for several days. On the other hand, facing the holidays without a loved one can be tough and leave you feeling lonely and sad.
Finances. With the added expenses of gifts, travel, food and entertainment, the holidays can put a strain on your budget — and your peace of mind. Not to mention that overspending now can mean financial worries for months to come.
Physical demands. Even die-hard holiday enthusiasts may find that the extra shopping and socializing can leave them wiped out. Being exhausted increases your stress, creating a vicious cycle. Exercise and sleep — good antidotes for stress and fatigue — may take a back seat to chores and errands. To top it off, burning the wick at both ends makes you more susceptible to colds and other unwelcome guests.
When stress is at its peak, it’s hard to stop and regroup. Try to prevent stress and depression in the first place, especially if the holidays have taken an emotional toll on you in the past.
Acknowledge your feelings. If someone close to you has recently died or you can’t be with loved ones, realize that it’s normal to feel sadness and grief. It’s OK to take time to cry or express your feelings. You can’t force yourself to be happy just because it’s the holiday season.
Reach out. If you feel lonely or isolated, seek out community, religious or other social events. They can offer support and companionship. Volunteering your time to help others also is a good way to lift your spirits and broaden your friendships.
Be realistic. The holidays don’t have to be perfect or just like last year. As families change and grow, traditions and rituals often change as well. Choose a few to hold on to, and be open to creating new ones. For example, if your adult children can’t come to your house, find new ways to celebrate together, such as sharing pictures, emails or videotapes.
Set aside differences. Try to accept family members and friends as they are, even if they don’t live up to all your expectations. Set aside grievances until a more appropriate time for discussion. And be understanding if others get upset or distressed when something goes awry. Chances are they’re feeling the effects of holiday stress and depression too.