There is something fundamentally wrong with my mother.

I went to help them on Friday only because my father asked. (Never returned mother's calls.)

Upon walking in the door:

Father: Hey wuts up. Thanks for coming.
Mother: Why do you look like that? What happened to your makeup? You need to put on makeup before the kids come in.

Me: What? (Didn't put makeup on)

Upon leaving:

Father: Thanks for coming. I put together some lunch for you. He hands me a bag with 2 chicken wraps a fruit & juice.

Mother: (after makeup) Now you look like a human.

So, I did good, right?

I rolled my eyes and ignored. I didn't spaz out! Hooray for me!