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By Your Side

Posted Aug 23 2008 3:19pm

Sade - By Your Side

Uploaded by sayit

"Since 1984, Sade has made a career out of crooning smoky romantic odes; her first single in eight years is no different. Over a sharply produced, folksy groove, the Brit chanteuse crafts a guitar-driven declaration of resolute affection. As comforting as the love it describes". Craig Seymour


I feel this song in my gut.

After I had my firstborn Jordy, I had severe post-partum depression. I was medicated, and so began my journey into motherhood. I used to rock him to sleep in his little bedroom during his first year or so. I was often tense, and desperately wanting him to go to sleep. He was a very intense and perceptive little guy who picked up on my vibes very easily. The thought soon crossed my mind that we both needed some music to relax. He had a little Fisher Price tape recorder, and I searched our collection of cassettes to find something that was slow and sleepy. (Going out and buying a lullaby tape was not an option, as we were barely able to make ends meet at that time). So I came across our Sade 'Lovers Rock' cassette, and it became his 'bedtime music'. It became so familiar and comforting to both of us. Most of the songs were true lullaby magic.

Tonight, I had just drifted off in bed when my younger son Drake started crying. He's still unwell from 'The Virus', and his sleep is troubled. He suffers from night terrors where he talks to me and cries about things, but is not awake at all. I usually have to bring in a cold cloth and gently wake him up; sometimes it takes awhile. He was frightened when he finally settled down, so I decided to climb up onto his top bunk and snuggle him back to sleep.

I rustled the covers around to get them just right, and settled into the silence; only, right... he sleeps with his radio playing softly to that channel that plays 'love songs' at night. The sounds of Sade's rich, comforting voice drifted up to me, and I instantly felt myself smiling sleepily and snuggling even deeper into Drake's back. Listening...and thinking...and feeling.

As well as bring back memories of that difficult, yet deeply tender time, this song also represents to me the kind of woman I'm striving to become. The strong inner core I'm trying to develop... this woman is so self-assured; she has a natural, strong, inner beauty. And a huge capacity for love. When I listen to it, the core of me feels full and content, yet I feel the heavy, bittersweet tug of yearning; It feels very strongly like this is my soul yearning for the woman in here I have yet to find and love.
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