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....but it pours

Posted Aug 23 2008 3:19pm
I know everyone must be dying to know how my mood has been lately, so I'm here to report that it has been as normal as normal can be. I'm feeling eerily centred, and calm lately; so much so that, even though I'm soaking all this normal right up, I'm a little suspicious at the same time.



I was half expecting the sleepless nights and constant caretaking of late to catch up with me, and send me for a header. Didn't happen.



And today has been one big ball of stressful situations, yet here I am near midnight, all serenity. I think I might be overtired. Maybe I'm 'over' everthing, to the point of being numbed out a bit.



I started work today. Had to leave my precious darlings with someone else all day. That was pretty darned hard. Work was hard. I think I sprained my brain. And my hip. Can you sprain a hip?



I started my period today. Does anyone else's body feels like it weighs about double, and like you're trying to move this mass of a double-weighing body through thick sludge? Just wondering. (Although I feel like quite a wimp compared to what some people have to endure each month, I know I've got it pretty easy).



My step-daughter (Brandy, 16) has come to stay for 10 days today. This was sprung on me at the last minute (like last night as I'm trying to organize the kids beach bags etc. for the sitter in the morning) , as my husband claims he 'hasn't had a chance' to discuss it with me.



The step-daughter and I? We do not get along. She has lived with us for the past 3 years until recently, and I was just getting used to her not being here. She is a big-time trigger for my mood shifts, and I am hoping I can use every trick in my bag to keep an emotional distance and not go there.



My son is mad at me. His father (my ex) and I were having a phone conversation about him in which we were fretting over the group of kids he is hanging out with lately, and in particular his girlfriend. Some things were said that we would have refrained from saying in his presence.



He was on the other extention listening to the whole thing.



I found out after I hung up, at which point we had a long discussion and he cried a lot. He was very hurt. He should not have been eavesdropping and he got a lecture on that. Waters were smoothed. Somewhat. I'm worried about him. 14 is scary.



Please forgive me if I don't come by your blog in the next few days. Or if I do, and not comment. I'm feeling a need to draw into myself a bit and maintain my centre.



Have I told you lately that I think you're wonderful and I'm glad we're bloggity friends? I do. And I am.



I think the Tylenol is finally starting to kick in.... nighty night.
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